Page 32 of That Baby (That Boy 3)
It's Chelsea's turn to laugh. "My nephew had one once while we were at his brother's hockey practice. Everything was going great. He was happily running his little cars across the bleachers. I was texting some hot guy when he tried to grab my phone and said he wanted to play with it. I calmly replied that it wasn't a toy; therefore, he couldn't play with it. He let out this screech like a hot poker got shoved through his arm. Then he rolled down two stairs, fell on the ground, and started pounding his head on the bottom bleacher. I was horrified!"
"What did you do?"
"I gave him my phone. He texted the hot guy the words snot and pusy. Deleted half my apps and then started playing an explicit song. The whole room filled with lyrics about eating dick for breakfast. I think having kids must be a humbling experience."
"Particularly when you give birth," Lori says. "When we toured a birthing room, they told us there are sometimes up to five strangers--all medical professionals, mind you--watching you give birth!"
"My sister says you go into some sort of birthing zone and don't give a shit who sees your vagina. You just want the baby out of you."
"I'm going to heat up some more enchiladas," I say, getting up to do so then bringing them back on a pretty platter.
"Wait!" Chelsea says, as I'm getting ready to serve them. "I have to take a picture of this. Line up our drinks too."
I artfully arrange our food and beverages.
"Perfect," she says, snapping away.
"Does your sister take pictures of her food?" I ask.
Chelsea laughs. "I think all she makes is macaroni and cheese. Although she uses gluten-free pasta and coconut milk."
"I'm considering making my own baby food," Lori tells us. "I've heard it's much healthier."
"Lately, I'm lucky if I have time to pick up the phone to call and order delivery," I say. "And it doesn't help that when Phillip's mom is here she makes the most amazing meals."
"She is such a good cook," Lori agrees. "These enchiladas are amazing."
"But I had visions of my husband coming home from work to find me in sexy lingerie, with an amazing dinner spread out in our perfectly decorated, candlelit dining room waiting for him."
"I think that's what is funny about the nevers," Chelsea laughs. "You know even though we say we won't do that stuff, we totally will."
April 15th
A surprise.
We go shopping and find Chelsea a dress that is perfect for a beach wedding, have lunch with the Macs, and then head over to the Diamonds.
Lori knocks on the front door.
"Oh, my goodness," Mrs. Diamond says, looking at Lori. "You've dropped."
"Do you think?" Lori asks.
"What's that mean?" I ask.
"When you drop, it means you're carrying the baby lower. It's usually a sign of impending birth."
"Oh, cool. So that's good!"
"Yes! I'm so excited!"
"Why don't you two go sit in the study," she says.
Mr. Diamond comes in and gives us both hugs. Then he and Mrs. D give Lori and I souvenirs from their trip. Gorgeous soft intricately woven shawls from Greece.
"What are those scratching noises?" I ask.
Mr. Diamond smiles at me. "I have a house warming present for you." He turns to his wife. "Go get her."
"Her?" I ask as a black blur tears into the room, jumps onto my lap, and licks my face.
"You got a puppy? She's so cute!" I say, petting the little black Labrador Retriever. "Oh my gosh, look at her face!"
"She's yours," Mr. Diamond says.
"What do you mean?"
"I bought her for you. I went out to a client's farm before we left on our trip, and I was remembering how I used to shoot skeet there with your dad. So he takes me inside and shows me his new puppies. All the puppies in the litter were male, except for her. The others were running around, biting each other, playing. She was looking at me with those big, adorable eyes. My client was sharing all their names and when he told me hers was Angel, I just knew you had to have her." He looks somber as he adds, "Yesterday was your dad's birthday. I can't believe it's been almost five years."
Tears fill my eyes. "Her name is really Angel?"
Mr. Diamond gives me a hug. "Yes. So what do you think? Do you want to keep her? Mary had a fit when I brought the puppy home today. Told me that I should have asked you first. It's peed on her carpet more times than it's gone outside. I told her she needed new carpet anyway. Doesn't matter now, though, she's in love with the puppy too. Angel can come stay at Grandpa's any time."
The puppy runs around in a circle, chasing a little ball. She's so adorable. I pick her up to snuggle her again and notice her pretty pink rhinestone collar.
"What a pretty collar."
"Did you see her name is on it?"
I look under her pudgy little neck and see a princess crown dog tag with Angel engraved on it.
It reminds me of the princess charm on my bracelet.
"Does Phillip know about the dog? He's always wanted one."
"Nope. I wanted to surprise you both."
I set the puppy down to hug Mr. Diamond. "Thank you."
"I went today and got everything you need. Kennel, food, leashes, collars, toys."
"I don't know how all this is going to fit in my car," I say. "It's packed full of baby shower gifts."
"Why don't you take my SUV?" Mr. D offers. "We'll be coming down to KC when the baby is born. We can switch back then."
Mr. Diamond's SUV is a gorgeous black Mercedes version. "Uh, sure," I say. "That's really nice of you."
"Why don't you play with Angel while I load everything?" he suggests.
I sit back down on the floor. Angel bounds onto my lap and covers my face with rough tongue kisses.
"You are so cute," I tell her, rubbing her ears. She jumps off me and runs across the room like a rocket, grabs a chew toy, and barrels back to me, her feet slipping on the hardwood.
"She's going to be a bit of a handful," Mrs. D says.
"Uh, yeah, but she's so damn cute. And I'm sure he named her Angel for a reason. She's probably a super good little puppy."
Angel drops her chew toy in my lap, so I toss it down the hall for her. She takes off running again.
"I'd recommend crate training her. That's what she's used to," Mrs. D explains. "And we've got a whole binder with all her shots and medical information. She's AKC breed and her parents are both Field Champions."
"Awesome. Thank you," I say. "What do you think, Lori?" I ask, trying to involve her. She hasn't said anything about the puppy.
"Cute," she says, but I get the feeling she doesn't really mean it.
The puppy comes running back toward me with a different toy in her mouth. She jumps up on my lap, curls up in a ball, and goes to sleep. "She's so freaking adorable. I just love her."
"All loaded up," Mr. D says. "Let's take Angel out back, run her around for a while, and hopefully she will sleep the whole way home."
When Lori and I are almost home, she finally says, "I just don't understand why they would get you a dog but not their own son one. He was telling them at the Super Bowl party how much he wants a puppy."
"I'm sure they would have gotten Danny a puppy if it weren't for the fact that his wife said, no way in hell. She also said that a baby would be enough to manage. They wouldn't want to upset his wife or cause trouble in his marriage."
"Maybe I wouldn't have trouble if you weren't Little Miss Perfect."
This pisses me off. It takes a lot to get me mad, but I've about had it. And if it weren't for the fact that I don't want to cause her to go into labor, I'd let her have it.
"I have nothing to do with the state of your marriage, Lori. That's between you and Danny."
"He's been acting all secretive lately. Barely talks to me. I haven't spoken to him since last night."
"Well, he probably barely talks, because no matter what he says you think he's either wrong or dumb. And he probably doesn't want to hear you bitch about
him having a little fun last night. You want your husband to be faithful and love you then you have to treat him with love, trust, and respect back. It's not his fault you don't feel good. It's not your fault either. It's just the pregnancy you were dealt. Why don't you try dealing with it together instead of letting it tear you apart?"
She doesn't reply.
As I pull into our neighborhood, I call Phillip. "Hey, what are you doing right now?"
"Waiting for my gorgeous wife to get home."
"Is Danny there too?" I ask.
"He is. We're watching ESPN and having a beer."
"Awesome. You're not going to believe the surprise I'm bringing home."
He lowers his voice. "Do I need to get rid of Danny?"
"No, this is something he'll want to see too."
"Baby stuff?"
"Not exactly. See you in a few."
After I carefully maneuver Mr. D's car into the garage, I tell Lori, "Danny and Phillip are in the basement watching TV. I'm going to let Angel go potty in the backyard and then take her in the basement door. Go on in. We can have the boys unpack the car later. They'll be so excited to meet Angel."
"That's kind of a dumb name for a dog," she says, cutting me to the bone. "I don't understand why Danny's dad thought it was so cute that he had to get it."
"Because Angel was my dad's nickname for me."
"Oh," she says. "Um, I'm just going to head home. Night."
