Page 16 of When We Had Forever
A cold prickle settles into my bones. It’s like he’s captured my deepest fears—things I haven’t even dared articulate to myself—in a few ruthless sentences. “But not you? Everyone’s asleep, but you’re awake?”
“Itryto be. I’m not saying I have it all figured out, just that life’s happening to us all the time already. The way I see it, there’s no such thing as tomorrow, because it’s only everright now. I’m only everright here. So the best option is to make each moment count. To live inside it with everything I have. Which means if today’s my last day, then yeah. I’ll spend it just like this. Here. With you.”
I stare at him for the hundredth time, only now...I don’t see the face, or the hair, or the eyes. I see a man who isn’t scattered or divided, but here in his entirety, and who doesn’t need anything else.
Holy shit. No wonder he seems so sure of himself.
And no wonder he draws me like a magnet. Already, half of me has rushed into next month and boarded a plane to Athens. Meanwhile, the other half is busy worrying whether it would be easiest to live in my brother’s shadow forever, the way my parents would prefer.
“Do you...?” I trail off, then try again, even though something in me curls tight at the question. “Do you thinkI’masleep?”
Michael searches my face. “Maybe. But if so, you’re in the process of waking up, and that’s all that really matters. Because if there’s no such thing as tomorrow, then there’s no such thing as yesterday, either. The only thing that counts is what you do with your right now.”
The words hit like a freight train. Between that and his casual approval of my innermost hopes, I feel like I’m staring in a brand-new direction I didn’t even realize existed. Suddenly, I’m burning to explore the possibility of right now.
My pulse hurtles into overdrive.What if I don’t get out at Rosalie’s house? What if—
In my hand, my cell dings, scattering the thoughts like blown confetti. Kate’s name pops up.
Crap. I should’ve texted her, but this drive has made it remarkably easy to forget.
I open her message, which consists of seventeen wordless question marks, and fire off a response.
Please don’t hate me, and if my mother asks, I’m with you. But that guy from the fair is taking me. We’re almost there.
Within seconds, a string of red-faced, bleep-mouthed emojis appears.
ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!
I switch my phone to silent, but it still buzzes like an angry hornet.
I KNEW you were gonna do something crazy. Has he tried to kill you yet?
No, I type back.But there’s still time.
Oh, HILARIOUS. Send me his information. At least I’ll have someone to tell the police about when they go looking for your body.
With a sigh, I pop the glove box open and rifle through, somehow certain Michael won’t mind.
Sure enough, he watches my invasion with barely concealed amusement. “Can I help you with something?”
I dig out the Audi’s registration papers and snap a picture. “Just sending this to Kate, in case she wants to steal your identity later.”
The corner of his mouth hitches upward. “Or have me arrested for kidnapping, you mean?”
I shrug, relieved to find the conversation back on solid ground. “That part’s kind of up to you, isn’t it?”
“She’s protective, too?”
“Mmm-hmm. You can imagine how much my mother adores her.” As I tuck the registration away, I spot something even better and pull it out. “Wow. Jackpot. Who keeps their driver’s license in their glove box?”
His brow wrinkles. He studies the card as if he doesn’t remember stashing it there. “I do, apparently.”
“But what happens if you’re out somewhere and need to buy alcohol?”
“Trick question. No one everneedsto buy alcohol.” Despite his easy answer, he stares at the flimsy rectangle as if itching to snatch it away.
It’s the first sign of anything other than complete self-assurance, and I latch on to the possibility that he might not be as incredible as he appears. Anything to make the next month at Rosalie’s feel as tempting as it did a few hours ago.
