Page 103 of When We Had Forever
“No. None of those.”
“Then when?”
When he folds his bottom lip under his teeth, the floor drops away. I know, with absolute certainty, that whatever he’s about to say will make this even worse.
“I can’t pinpoint a moment.” If he looked broken before, now he’s shattered. “But when I look back on my stupid, fucked-up mess of a life, everything changed from the first moment I saw you. You just came walking by, threw a pie at me, and I was never the same again.”
I don’t move. Neither does he. Silence fills my ears to overflowing, and in the quiet, I canhearmyself break, a soft little snap that reverberates for miles.
“That wasyou? At the fair?”
“Yeah. That was me.”
Roughly a century creaks by. “But you told me your name was Michael.”
“I didn’t, actually.” Desperation surges in his voice. “That old lady said that. I just didn’t correct her. Look, I can explain. Because up until the other day, I thought youknew. All these years, I thought you knew you’d met me first. Michael said he’d told you. It wasn’t until your email the other day that I realized he’d lied. That you barely knew I existed.”
Another alien laugh tumbles out. “Oh, so this is all a dead man’s fault? How convenient.”
He flinches. “I know how it looks. And I should’ve told you everything on the phone. But you told me you hated me, and I knew if I explained, you’d hang up and that would be the end of it.”
“That should’ve been what happened,” I spit out.
“You’re right. And I have no excuse for coming here. I mean, Ididgenuinely want to make sure you were okay, but the rest was selfish. I just thought that if maybe you got to know me, if I couldshowyou the real me...” His Adam’s apple bobs up and down.
I stare. “Then what? What did you think would happen, Grayson?”
“Maybe you wouldn’t tell me to fuck off, once you knew.”
For long moments, I say nothing, my entire being reduced to a whirl of hurt. “Just tell me one more thing.”
“Anything.” He sounds raspy. Ground down. “Ask me anything.”
“How many times have we had sex? You and I? How badly did the two of you trick me?”
His eyes widen, as if he wasn’t expecting that. “Zero. You and I, we’ve never... I mean, this would’ve been the first...”
He trails off. Wisely, I decide.
“Look,” he says, “I know how overwhelming this must seem, but there’s so much more. I can explain.”
“Explain? How, by blaming everything on Michael?” Cold whispers slither through me, reminders of all the secrets my husband kept. Butthis... Even Michael couldn’t have stooped so low. “Because if that’s all you have to say, I don’t want to hear it.”
Grayson grimaces. “But he—”
“Right,” I say. “Get out.”
“Mina, I—”
“No. Get out. This is my house, and you’re not welcome in it anymore, and I swear if you don’t walk out that door right now,Iwill. I’ll drive back to Seagrove and this will be the last time you ever see me.”
The color drains from his face. I’ve struck a nerve. A deep one.
I scrounge up the strength to stand and go to where our clothes lie on the floor. I pick up everything and toss it at his feet, including the necklace. I don’t want to touch it again. “Get dressed and get out.”
“I will, if that’s what you need right now. But please, Mina...” A horrible, shuddering exhale leaves him. “You might not want to hear it now, but you deserve to know the whole story.”
“It sounds like I already do.” I turn my back and pull the blanket tighter. “You’re a liar. And you left me fourteen years ago. The end. Now leave me alone.”
