Page 67 of Lessons in Touch

She lifts her head, sleepy and tired now after the lovemaking. "What is it?"

I sit up and reach for my shirt. The movement feels symbolic somehow, like I'm putting my armor back on.

"Rose, this has to end."

That’s all I manage to say.

The words hang in the humid air between us. Rose sits up, too, pulling her dress back on.

"What do you mean?"

"Our relationship has to come to an end now, Rose. I should have done this a long time ago, but I just couldn’t. It’s time now." Each word feels like swallowing glass. "The private lessons are over."

"I don't understand." Her voice is faint, confused. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No. You've done nothing wrong. This is about protecting you."

"From what?"

There's no gentle way to say this. "Cassandra has a video of us from the museum trip."

Rose's face goes white. "A video of us doing what?"

"Everything." I can't meet her eyes. "Someone filmed us in the car. Everything we did that day. Us having sex, the diamond anal plug, just everything..."

She's quiet for a long moment, processing this. When she speaks again, her voice is barely above a whisper. "How do you know?"

"Professor Thompson told me. It's already circulating among some students. It's only a matter of time before it spreads everywhere."

I can see her mind working, calculating the implications.

"If this gets out," I continue, "you'll be expelled. And you will be blacklisted from every decent school in the country. Your inheritance, your future with the family—all of it will be gone."

"And you?" she asks. "What happens to you?"

I shrug, trying to appear nonchalant. "I'll lose my job. My Senate campaign will be over before it starts. But I'm established. I have money and connections, and I'll survive."

"That's not fair!"

"Life isn't fair, Rose. But I won't let you pay the price for my mistakes."

She stands up abruptly, reaching for her coat. "Your mistakes? Is that what this was to you?"

"That's not what I meant…"

"Then what did you mean?" She puts her coat back on with sharp, angry movements. "Because it sounds like you're saying our entire relationship was a mistake."

I stand too, wanting to comfort her, but knowing I can't. "What I'm saying is that I should have been more careful. I should have thought about the consequences before I let this happen."

"Let this happen? You’re making it sound like I had no choice in any of this."

"You're twenty-three, Rose, and you're my student. The power dynamic—"

"Don't." She holds up a hand, stopping me. "Don't you dare reduce what we have to a power dynamic. Don't minimize my feelings or my choices."

I want to tell her she's right. That what we have is real and beautiful and worth fighting for. But I can't. Not when it could destroy her.

"I'm trying to protect you."