Page 71 of When the Walls Come Down
However, when Casey rolled in just before lunch explaining that Roe had woken up with fever, I started to worry.
I was in no position to blow his phone up with where the hell are you texts. I wasn’t exactly his girlfriend or his mom, but I was concerned. This wasn’t like him.
Whatever. He could give me shit later if he didn’t like me checking in on him.Me: So should I program you into my phone as Duke Longfellow now? Or are you planning to show up today?It was radio silence for the rest of the day. Not even a text bubble of hope appearing on the screen, not that I’d been staring at our thread all damn day or anything.
After a few internal arguments between the concerned woman who was in love with him and the star employee trying not to look like she cared too much, I decided to craft a subtle email to Casey asking if Shane was sick.
It was probably a little too subtle, because Casey’s only explanation was: Nope. He’ll be back on Friday.
What. The. Hell?
Good news: Short of a prescheduled resurrection, he hadn’t accidentally plunged to his death over the edge of his balcony.
Bad news: I had no clue where he was, why he wasn’t answering my texts, or why he hadn’t told me he was taking a few days off before he’d left.
I also had no idea why all of that bothered me as much as it did. I’d told him that, in two weeks, we could reevaluate our relationship, aside from the promise of sex on the weekends. There were a lot of things still up in the air.
But was a simple heads-up or even reply to my text too much to ask? Only a few nights earlier, he had touched every inch of my body with every inch of his, and now he was off doing God knew what.
Okay, so, perhaps I was overreacting a smidge.
However, overreacting or not, by the time my phone dinged at ten that night, I. Was. Pissed. And the worst part was I knew I had absolutely zero right to be pissed, which only made me more pissed because… Damn it, I missed him.Shane: Hey, you still up? Wanna FaceTime?I decided to take the high road and go for dismissive and unaffected. Fine! It was the middle road at best.Me: Nah. I’m already in bed. Hope you had a good day.Shane: Actually, I did. How was yours?Frustrating. Confusing. Emotionally exhausting.Me: Good.Shane: Awesome. Hey, listen, I left a key to my place with Clarke. If you aren’t too busy, you think you can pop in and water my kneepads and maybe roll around in my bed naked a few times? I know how they get lonely when I leave.I typed out the equivalent of where the hell are you six different ways before deleting them all.Me: I’m sure they’ll be fine without you.Shane: You sure you don’t want to FaceTime? I don’t mind if you are in bed. You can even slip me under the covers to free up your hands.And now he was flirting. Outstanding.Me: I gotta be up early in the morning. Goodnight, Shane.Shane: Sweet dreams (of me) Peach.I woke up the next morning feeling a lot less bristly about the situation. Maybe he had a family emergency or something he didn’t want to talk about. That was fair. He was allowed to have his own life without me trying to barge my way into every facet. I actually felt like a dick for having been annoyed in the first place.
Complex non-relationships with friends you’re trying to get fired while also being in love with are seriously hard sometimes.
On my way to work Thursday morning, I typed out an apology.Me: Hey, sorry about last night. I was in a crap mood. Want to FaceTime tonight? Spoiler alert: I’ll be fully dressed, but I might be able to sneak a shoulder out if you’re nice enough.It took two hours for him to reply.Shane: Shit. I have plans tonight until about midnight your time. I should be back in time for the usual at Two Ships tomorrow. You game?I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, people flooding past me on either side, and reread his text twice. He had plans until midnight my time. Which meant he wasn’t in the same time zone. I’d convinced myself that he had gone back home to Seattle to deal with some family issues. But that would have been Pacific time too. This was interesting.
Sick of wondering and also sick of hating myself for wondering so much, I decided to just ask. He wasn’t being forthcoming, but I was sure he wasn’t hiding anything either.Me: Where are you?That text bubble bounced all the way to Bay Brewing. Then it continued to bounce as I walked to my office, changed my shoes, opened my computer, and fought the urge to throw up.
