Page 16 of The Ragpicker King
“He offered to tell the Sanhedrin not to come and test me. I think he was trying to be kind.”
Chana snorted. “There is no kindness in telling the Sanhedrin you lied about being the Goddess Returned. You are not a liar.” She looked closely into Lin’s face. “Few know of the good you havealready done for Mariam, and I believe there is so much more good you can do for our people. There is a reason you stood up in that moment at the Tevath and claimed your power. Do not let fear take that reason from you now.”
The earnestness in Chana’s voice seemed to strike at Lin’s heart. What would Chana say if she told her that she had stood up in that moment because she knew that the ships in the harbor would burn at the hour of midnight? That she had learned of the plan to burn them, in fact, in the house of the Ragpicker King, a man of distinctly low moral character? It helped that the Laws he was breaking were not Ashkar Laws, but there would still be many questions if it was found that Lin was regularly visiting the Black Mansion.
It was at the Black Mansion that she had learned of Ciprian Cabrol’s plan to burn the Roverge ships. That burning was the one reason most in the Sault credited her claim, even with hesitation:When the Goddess returns, she will come in fire.It was close enough, and how else would she have known?
She knew she could not tell Chana the truth, and it weighed upon her. Chana’s belief weighed upon her like a chain around her neck. Like Mayesh’s medallion. Though Mayesh was a different tale entirely.
“I ought to go see Mariam,” she said, and bent to kiss the older woman’s cheek. Chana smelled ofkarakspices and strong medicinal herbs. As Lin drew back, Chana took light hold of the sleeve of her dress.
“The Maharam is just a man,” she said. “He is not the Goddess, nor even the Exilarch. He is afraid the life he has always known is going to change, and you represent that change. All the things that have always made him important will no longer do so.”
“But if he believes in the Goddess, he must also believe in the future she brings,” said Lin. “In Aram, he would be honored for his service to her.”
Chana’s smile was mournful. “He has only ever sung our songs in a strange land,” she said. “He may fear he will find Aram foreign.The cantillations of a faraway place may not be music he can imagine.”
A faraway place.The words echoed in Lin’s head as she made her way down the hall to Mariam’s room. It was late and the lamps were low, but she would always know her way around the Etse Kebeth, even in the dark.
Aram was meant to be more than a faraway land in the heart of every Ashkar. It was meant to be an imagined perfect home, far different from the uninhabitable slag heap it was now.
Still, when Lin tried to picture Aram, she could only conjure up visions of green hills and placid sheep. A storybook land, not real. She had never truly imagined leaving the streets of Castellane. In that way, perhaps she was not so different from the Maharam.
Before Lin went into Mariam’s room, she took her brooch from her pocket and pinned it to her sleeve, close to the pulse of her wrist. The Arkhe stone in it shone, but it was the lifeless shine of reflected light. No gleam came from within the stone itself. Lin tore her gaze from it, its darkness emblematic of her failure.
She found Mariam in bed, reading a thick tome full of painted fashion plates. She sat up when Lin came in, her thin face lighting up, her blankets slipping about her shoulders. She wore a nightgown of thick needlecord despite the warmth of the night. “Lin! I’ve been missing you.”
Lin felt a wave of guilt. She knew she should be visiting Mariam more often, but between her studies of magic, her frequent trips to the Black Mansion, and her responsibilities as the Goddess Returned, she often felt she was living three lives.
Mariam must have seen something in her face. “No, don’t—don’tfeel badly. I didn’t mean it that way.” She set her book down and gestured for Lin to join her on the bed. “Come. I want to hear everything you’ve been doing.”
Lin settled onto the worn coverlet, legs drawn up under her. She and Mariam had spent hours of their adolescence like this, trading bits of gossip and fantasy and imagination. Stories they hadheard or invented. Places they wished to travel; whether they wanted to marry someday, and if so, to whom. Whether, if magic really worked, they’d rather have the power to fly or become invisible. But what could she tell Mariam now?As you know, I have been trying to teach myself magic using the books from the Shulamat, but I keep running into the same walls over and over again.Or:I am terrified of what will happen when the Exilarch comes.Or:I do most of my work in the Black Mansion of the Ragpicker King, but I pretend I am out visiting patients.
“I was at House Alleyne,” she said instead. “With Antonetta.”
Mariam’s eyes flew wide. “You were up on the Hill? Is there any news about the Prince’s engagement? It’s all anyone’s talking about in the city.”
Lin wished she had taken Chana up on her offer of tea. Her mouth was dry. She said, “Antonetta didn’t mention it. To be honest...” She leaned in conspiratorially. “We were discussing a different wedding. Antonetta’s fiancé is arriving in Castellane soon.”
Mariam wrinkled up her nose. “Is she still marrying the toad?”
“Alas, yes. And her mother is throwing an engagement party to celebrate the toad. And—Antonetta asked me if I would come.”
“I thought you swore you’d never go to another party on the Hill.”
“I know, but...” Lin threw up her hands. “I just can’t leave Antonetta to face it all alone. I’m not sure there’s anyone else in her life who understands.”
“You’re a good friend,” said Mariam. “As I have cause to know.”
“I’m not sure I am Antonetta’s friend,” Lin mused. “I am her physician. Though I am fairly sure she keeps our appointments because she wishes to talk, not because there’s anything wrong with her.”
“I would say that makes you her friend,” said Mariam. “But I am no expert on such distinctions. Iam,however, an expert in the field of fashion.” Her eyes sparked in her thin face. “What will you wear to your second party among the nobility of Castellane?”
“Oh.Ugh.I don’t care what I wear,” Lin said. “I’m not interested in impressing any of those vacuous popinjays on the Hill.”
“But you are the Goddess now,” Mariam said. “You represent the Ashkar and the people of the Sault. You cannot go to the Hill in a burlap sack.”
“My grandfather represents the Ashkar and the people of the Sault.”
