Page 107 of Run
“Working. Shaking her ass at the bar like you used to do.” Opening a cupboard and rummaging around, I find something I can make quick. “At least you got the hell out of there. Maybeyou aren’t as retarded as your momma. At least you got some more brains than Lena.”
I fill a pot with water and put it on the stove, firing up the burner as I hear footsteps behind me. “You still doing that computer job, or whatever the hell you told me last time?”
“Yep,” I answer, knowing what’s coming next.
“Well?” He’s right behind me now. “You going to pony up, or what? After all I’ve done for you.”
Before he can continue, I reach into my back pocket, pull out a small wad of folded up bills, and hold it out, not turning around to look at him. He takes it and I hear him flipping through the cash. “Not too shabby.”
The water starts to boil, so I open the box of pasta and dump it into the pot, then grab a wooden spoon off the counter—I have no idea if it’s clean, nor do I care—and stir the noodles around.
Sophie beeps the horn outside, letting me know I’m halfway through my allotted time.
I turn to the sink, pushing the stopper down and turning on the water before taking the dish soap and dribbling the liquid all over the mountain of dishes, then watch bubbles accumulate as the water rises.
“You should soak your dishes, that way you won’t have to scrub them,” I say.
I hear the thud of Axel’s work boots hitting the door as he discards them. “What are you, the fucking queen? You live in that fancy house now with those goody-two-shoes, and you think you know how to keep a clean house? Is that it?”
When I don’t answer, his voice booms through the house. “Answer me!”
I jump, adrenaline rushing through me, and I bask in its high.
There it is.That, right there, is what I can’t reason: the familiar fear incited by Axel’s booming voice that is often followed by physical pain—and the craving I have for it. The anticipation ofit, wondering what he’s going to dish out next and whether I’ll be able to take it. And the pride in knowing that I can. The strength I find in it.
I shut off the water once I see the sink is full, and turn and look into his eyes, trying to decide how far I can push before it goes too far. I pick up the wooden spoon and stir the pasta.
“Yes,” I say softly.
“What’s that?” he barks behind me.
“I said, ‘Yes.’” I turn to look over my shoulder at him. “Yes, I know how to keep a nice house. Because the Millers don’t live in filth like this.” I wave my hand around at the surroundings and fury clouds Axel’s eyes, causing a sense of satisfaction to wash over me. And then I make a rookie mistake. I turn my back to him and continue stirring the pot.
I hear something smash behind me, and then his footsteps as he stomps over and presses himself against my back. But I don’t turn around. I don’t back down. I just keep stirring with a shaky hand. “Listen here,” he growls in my ear. “You think you’re so much better than me? You’re not. You’re still the girl nobody wanted, who I took in because I felt pity for. So, you think about that before you insult me in my house again. Got it?”
I don’t answer, instead lifting the spoon out of the pot and placing it on the counter.
Axel roars behind me. “GOT IT?” Despite my best efforts not to, I flinch, and Axel chuckles.
“Yeah, I thought so.” His finger skates across the side of my neck as he pulls some hair away from my shoulder. I shudder because this is the first time he’s touched me since I started visiting him, and I don’t like it. “You’re still a scared little girl, aren’t you?”
Just as I go to shut the burner off, Axel turns to retreat, but not before shoulder-checking me, and when he does, it’s just enough force that I shoot my hand out to brace myself and it lands righton the flame of the burner. I cry out in pain and quickly run to the sink and turn on the cold water, holding my throbbing hand under the running faucet. Axel chuckles as he goes to the fridge and opens it, then bends down and pulls an apple out of the crisper. He shuts the fridge and leans against it as he shines the apple on his filthy undershirt, before taking a bite and crunching loudly as he chews and swallows.
“What’s wrong, girl? Can’t take it like you used to?”
I turn the water off when I hear Sophie’s double-beep, knowing my time is up. But as soon as the cold water is gone, my hand erupts in pain, so I turn it back on and grab a nearby dishrag and soak it, then hold it over my burning flesh.
Shit, this hurts. But I’m soothed by the familiar mantra from my childhood that resurfaces in my mind.Don’t cry. Don’t you dare cry.
Sophie beeps again and I know she’s going to call the cops if I don’t go out there now. I make eye contact with Axel before pushing away from the counter and heading toward the door, cradling my hand in the towel.
As I walk past him, he says, “See you next time, Arlene.”
CHAPTER 36
ARI
Nerves flutter in my belly as we pull into the parking lot of the bar. I’m wearing black skinny jeans and a thin, long-sleeved red sweater that barely meets my waistline. Meg curled the ends of my hair for me since my hand is out of commission.
