Page 97 of First-Time Caller
Aiden frowns in the reflection.
I turn to unlock my car but he catches my hand with his. My keys bite into my fingers.
“Lucie,” he says, a thin thread of something looping around the sounds of my name. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.”
It’s not his fault I feel like I’m being handed a consolation prize. He’s been nothing but honest and I’m—I’m tired, I think. For so many reasons. My head and my heart have always had trouble being on the same page, but they feel especially far apart right now.
I give him a smile and try to memorize what he looks like with my kisses burned against his mouth. I press up on my toes and drop one more on his cheek, squeezing his fingers with mine.
“I think you’re supposed to say good night.”
Mateo is on my couch when I slip through my front door, a book in his hand and an empty tea mug on the coffee table. I’m not expecting him and my keys go flying across the hardwood.
When I bend down to scoop them up, I feel like I have a neon sign on my forehead:
I MADE OUT WITH AIDEN AT THE RADIO STATION.
In smaller letters right beneath:
AND I LIKED IT A LOT.
Sans serif font, size eight in the bottom right corner:
PROBABLY SHOULDN’T DO IT AGAIN, THOUGH.
“I didn’t mean to startle you,” Mateo says as I slowly straighten. He sets his book next to his empty mug. “Maya wanted to sleep here tonight.”
I frown and glance up the stairs. “Is everything okay?”
He nods. “Everything is fine. Grayson is on an art bender and she said the smell of the paint was giving her a headache.” He stands from the couch with a yawn. “But between me and you, I think she’s been missing you. I caught her trying to keep herself awake with her books.”
My heart pinches in my chest. I’ve been spending too much time at the station. Too much time away. “Thanks for bringing her over.”
“Of course.” He closes the space between us and squeezes my arm, a knowing look on his face. “And don’t start, okay? You deserve to do things for you.”
I unwind my scarf from around my neck. “But if Maya’s been needing me . . .”
If she’s been needing me while I’ve been making out in radio booths and playing Skee-Ball and getting piggyback rides on the way home from bars from handsome men—
He shakes his head. “She’s been missing you, not needing you. You’ve met all of her needs with unfailing precision for the past twelve years. Now it’s time to do something for you.” Mateo ducks his head so I have no choice but to meet his warm brown eyes. I’ve heard Grayson call themwhiskey on the rocks eyesmore than once. It’s an apt description. “What she needs is to see her mom prioritizing her own happiness for once. So she can learn to do the same.”
“That’s”—I have to pause and steady my voice—”that’s really nice, Teo.”
“It’s also really true.” He twists his neck back and forth and picks up his book. “I listened to the show tonight. You sounded happy.”
I immediately think of Aiden’s hand in my braid. The low rasp of his voice while his hands tugged my body closer to his. The creak of his chair and the shape of his smile in the glow of his computer screen.
I press my lips together and examine the warm glowy feeling burning right under my skin. “I am happy,” I say slowly, afraid if I acknowledge it too loudly, the feeling might scurry away. “The show has been good for me, I think.”
Mateo hums in agreement, fighting a smile. I narrow my eyes.
“Grayson told you about finding Aiden in the living room, didn’t he?”
“Of course he did,” Mateo says with another yawn. He grins at me sleepily. “But in my role as favorite co-parent, I’m not going to pry.”
“Thank you.”
“I’ll leave that to my better half, who will likely have ten thousand questions when this commissioned piece is done. And that meddling daughter of ours, who was trying to stay up so she could interrogate you.”
