I shot up and raised both hands, backing away toward the doors to the living room. “I’m going, I’m going.”
I wasn’t fond of being treated like a disposable tissue by people, least of all by the woman I once loved, but Iwasfond of letting her win arguments.
I marched straight to the kitchen. That barbecue smell undid me. I flung open the fridge, with every intention of eating the entire goddamn thing, and tore off the lids to all the Tupperware in sight.
Well, fuck.
Steamed broccoli. Unseasoned chicken breast. Cauliflower rice. Nasty shit I usually ate to maintain my ten percent body fat. I tossed some frozen chicken nuggets into the air fryer, then dumped two packets of Buldak ramen into boiling water. What was the point of having Chris Hemsworth’s body if Briar didn’t want to climb it?
A loud thud startled me into missing the colander. My noodles took a dive down the drain, along with my soul. I snapped my eyes up from the sink. Briar’s tiny fists still curled around the tray she’d slammed onto the butcher’s block island. The half-empty drinks sloshed in their cups, spilling everywhere.
“I came in to put a load in the dishwasher.” She blew a lock of hair from her eye. “No need to make conversation.”
Fine by me. I nodded, silent, deliberately getting in her way as she moved around the kitchen. Her bikini bottoms rolled between her ass cheeks haphazardly, and her nipples stood as erect and pointy as two tiny diamonds. I wanted to scoop them into my mouth through the fabric and show her that her brain might hate me, but her body didn’t share the sentiment.
Briar yanked on the dishwasher handle and began stacking cocktail glasses inside. “What are you looking at?”
“Want some help?”
“You could help me by dropping dead.” Still crouched, she felt for the surface above her head, found a flute, and tucked it inside the dishwasher. “It was completely humiliating back there. You sounded like my dad.”
“No offense, but your dad wouldn’t give a shit. He’d let you drive.Icare, so I’m keeping you from harm’s way. You’ll be able to drive again in a matter of weeks. I’m not chancing anything. I can take you anywhere you want in the meantime. Be your little bitch. It’ll be fun.” I stopped to think about it. “Well, for you, at least.”
“Where was that energy when my parents disowned me at eighteen?”
“It was still there. I just had a lot to juggle, and I was overwhelmed. I was a kid, Briar.”
Would I have done anything different today? Yes. I’d like to think I would. In fact, IknewI would not have abandoned her if I could turn back time. I would do a lot of things differently. I’d tell Sebastian to fuck off when he issued the demand. I’d let him stay in England. I wouldn’t have pushed him off that boat.
But hindsight is 20/20.
Maybe I’d spent the past decade just telling myself what I wanted to believe.
Briar slammed the dishwasher shut, pushing some buttons until it roared to life. “Why are you lying to the entire world?”
I leaned on the counter from the opposite side, simply watching her and enjoying every second.
“You’re going to have to be more specific than that.” I raked her delicious body with my eyes, head-to-toe. “I throw a lot of lies out there.”
I never understood Zach and Romeo’s obsession with art, but I admitted now that they might’ve been onto something. Some things, you could spend eternity staring at and never get enough of.
“You’re lying to your friends about being a dumbass and an airhead.” Briar swiveled to face me. “You are none of those things.”
“Easier this way. Less expectations. Less pressure.”
“You’ve never had an issue with pressure before.” She squinted at me, leaning against the same counter I rested on. “What happened between then and now?”
The air fryer finished, beeping for me to open it up. I ignored it.
“I lost my trust in myself to do the right thing,” I growled out.
It was true. That year screwed me up.
Briar nodded. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, you weren’t the worst boyfriend I’ve ever had.”
My gaze dropped to her lips. “No?”
They were so fucking pouty and pink. I wanted to tug them in my mouth and run my tongue along the seam. Thelastthing I wanted, however, was to think about her exes. Maiming them with my bare hands, on the other hand …