Page 84 of Let's Call a Truce
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“It’s targeted recruitment. Do you consider it discriminatory?”
“We go there because those students are reliable, like the people referred to us are reliable.”
“We will still require references for all applicants, regardless of their backgrounds, so you would not be going into anything blindly. So what are you so afraid of?”
“This is how it starts.” He turned to Eduardo, pointing an accusing finger at me and Asia. “People like them come in and demand we change, saying it’s only a little here and there. Then they start dictating who we hire and who gets promoted, and the whole company will fall apart.”
I sputtered, furious at the entitlement of this man. He and his people were supposed to fight us on the program, to make half-hearted arguments about how diversity programs hurt companies even when there was overwhelming proof they had positive impacts on overall success. I didn’t expect blatant personal attacks on us as individuals.
“That’s enough.” My stomach plummeted as Ben cut in. “This is a pointless conversation, especially considering every single person on the executive board supports the initiative. And it’s one thing to want to discuss the program and another to attack the people who created it.”
“It’s my right to express my concerns.”
“Sure it is,” Ben replied. “And it’s our right to listen to thoseconcerns and then decide what we think is best for the health of KMG. It is also our right to cut you off when you insult our employees.”
“And you are so sure you know what’s best—”
Eduardo cut off the fight before it could get worse. “You said you had three concerns. Let’s hear the last so we can end this meeting.”
“Our last concern is you are so focused on forcing those new people into our company culture. Maybe the reason we haven’t hired these people is because they aren’t the right fit for KMG, and you pushing it is going to hurt morale.”
“Enough.” Eduardo’s voice boomed through the conference room. Everyone reeled back in surprise. I had never heard him use a tone like that before. “People of color won’t fit into this company culture?Iam Latino, one ofthose peopleyou are worried about. Are you suggesting I do not fit within the company culture of the company I created and oversee?”
Connor blanched, realizing his epic mistake. Eduardo stood from his spot, looking down his nose at each of the employees.
“So far in this meeting you have insulted and attacked two well-respected members of this company, implied that only white men fit into this company culture, and stated your adamant opposition for an initiative celebrated by our executive team. You saythese peoplewon’t fit into the company culture? I think it is time you consider ifyoufit into the company culture. Your VP and I will have extensive conversations about it ourselves.”
Everyone filtered out of the conference space in silence. I had intended to head back to my office to process everything but found myself heading up the stairs to the architecture floor. I slipped into Ben’s office, making sure the door closed behind me. His head shot up, his eyes filling with hope before taking in my body language and shifting to concern.
“I don’t need you to fight my battles,” I said.
“Are you talking about Connor?” I nodded in response. “How was that fighting your battles?”
“You jumped in when he got aggressive. You can’t tell me you would have done it for another employee.”
“Yes, I would have. I support this path for KMG. I told you that before we even got together. Do you really find it so surprising I would continue to support it after we broke up?”
“I could have shut him down if you had given me the chance.”
“I’m sorry. You can handle yourself. But he wouldn’t stop until he knew the entire executive team was on board. He was convinced you talked Eduardo into it, and he could sway the rest of us to his side to overrule him.”
“And because you are a man, you can handle it better than me?” I asked.
“You’re trying to pick a fight with me right now, and I’m not going to take the bait. It’s been a long day. Let’s talk instead of fight, please.”
“I said I could have handled it.” I shifted on my feet, disappointment in myself rising up. My voice dropped to a whisper. “I should have been able to handle it.”
He stood from his desk and walked over to me. He placed a finger under my chin, tilting my head to meet his eyes but keeping a safe distance.
“It wasn’t about you. He’s threatened, and he’s lashing out. When you try to make big changes, there are always going to be people coming for you, and you’ll need people in your corner. I hope you know I’ll be there, not because of our history, but because you have proven the value you bring to this company every day you’ve spent here.”
“I feel like a complete fraud. What does an underqualified mess, with only a handful of years of experience, have to contribute? I don’t even know if I candothis job, much less get the other employees to respect me. Connor and his cronies certainly don’t. What is Eduardo thinking? And how the hell am I supposed to keep from disappointing him?”
Tears filled my eyes, and I held them at bay until he pulled me in for a hug. I cried into his shirt, overwhelmed by the feeling of inadequacy. He sat down in one of his chairs, pulling me onto his lap and holding me through all the pain and frustration.
“You are spectacular.” He smoothed his hand over my hair. “You deserve this promotion. You haven’t worked as long as some others, but you’ve done so much in that time. Don’t let a person like Connor take that away from you. He’s a lazy, entitled man who is freaking out because he sees the world changing. He’s threatened by people like you. When Christina retires and you take over, every person at this company is going to get to see how lucky we are. It’s intimidating. But remember, you earned this. Things are messy with us right now, but please let me be there for you. At least let me back you up when you deserve it.”
