My thumbnail found its way between my teeth, and I yanked it back out before I could let the nervous tic take root. I’d splurged—with money I didn’t have—on a manicure before starting, and I wouldn’t let an old habit make that even more of a waste.
A booming voice came from the front of the room, pulling my attention to a friendly looking man in his late sixties. “I love seeing all of this interdivisional interaction, but we need to get this meeting started.”
Though we had only met in passing during my interview processes, I recognized our CEO, Eduardo Muñoz. Christina settled into the seat next to me. My brown-eyed gentleman—thebrown-eyed gentleman, not mine—sat down a few rows in front of me, and I berated myself for noticing.
You are here to work, Juliana. Not ogle.
“Before we start, I’m going to ask our newest teammate to introduce herself. Juliana is joining Christina’s team in human resources as a talent acquisition specialist. Come on up, Juliana.”
Christina had prepped me for this, but my heart still thundered in my chest. My elevator pitch, which had been second nature at twenty-five, came less confidently at thirty-three, after so long without saying it.
“Good afternoon, everyone.” I hoped the strength of my voice distracted people from my trembling hands. “As Eduardo said, my name is Juliana Ryan, and I’m excited to join the KMG family. I’m an Orlando native, though I left for a time to get my degree at the University of Florida in Human Resources Management.” A few people shouted “Go Gators” from the audience, to chuckles and cheers from several others. The camaraderie made me bolder, and I threw a quick Gator chomp to my fellow alumni.
“I worked at one of the large staffing agencies before taking time away to care for my two daughters. Don’t worry, I can still handle this. I’m sure any other parents out there will agree after managing kids for seven years, everything else will seem easy.”
This gained laughs from most of those in the room, and a wave of confidence crashed through me. I was good at this before I had kids. No, I wasfantastic.Christina literally cried when I gave my two weeks’ notice. Seven years at home didn’t change what I was capable of.
The realization made me feel lighter as I finished the last of my introduction. “I’ll recruit the best candidates for all your departments, and I’m looking forward to getting to know everyone. My door is always open.”
“Thank you, Juliana.” Eduardo shook my hand as he joined me back on the stage. “All hiring managers, please stand so Juliana can see who all she’ll be working with.”
A dozen people sprinkled throughout the auditorium stood. We may have worked at the same company, but they were my clients, the people to impress. They had final say on the applicants I recruited, and if they didn’t trust my judgment, I wouldn’t last long here.
I smiled and nodded to each manager, my gaze landing last on Mr. Brown Eyes himself. The teasing grin was gone, replaced by pinched brows and a skeptical look that had me running through my elevator pitch to figure out what caused such a drastic change. The only explanation I could come up with was my previous work experience—or lack thereof.
I knew some people would judge me, would make assumptions and dismiss me for the time spent at home, but it stung more that it was him, someone I hoped would be a friendly face in the office. It was an absurd reaction to have. I didn’t know him. One half-friendly, half-humiliating interaction in the break room did not a friendship make.
I made my way back to my seat, fluctuating between extreme confidence and extreme anxiety with a speed that made me dizzier than the teacup ride at Disney. I allowed myself one internal freak-out, wondering how many people were judging my life choices. By the time the meeting ended, I had tucked away all those doubts and fears to be dealt with another day.
Stranger after stranger rushed to introduce themselves to me as we left the auditorium. Some people wanted to say they were meeting me later, but most just wanted to scope out the new girl. The conversations were cut short when my phone vibrated in my pocket, and my entire body went rigid asWOLF CREEK ELEMENTARYflashed across the screen.
I excused myself, finding a place down the hall to answer. “Hello, this is Juliana Ryan.”
“Hi, Juliana. This is Robin Berry.”
I seized up further, realizing the call was coming from the principal of my girls’ school.
“Sophie ran into a bit of trouble today. Another student made a comment about her dad, and she hit him. We’d typically handle this in class, but the other student was bleeding. And, between you and me, his mother is a bit… excitable. I’m hoping together we can come up with a solution that doesn’t involve a suspension, but I think it will be easier if you’re here.”
“Of course. I’ll be there as soon as I clear up my schedule at work. Is half an hour okay?”
“That works. I’ll see you soon.”
The call cut off, and I let my head fall forward. My youngest daughter had always experienced big feelings. That meant wild enthusiasm and joy, but also a quick temper. Which apparently translated to punching little shits on the playground, and me having to leave work on my first day.
So what if I get fired for not being able to make it throughone fucking daywithout my life falling apart around me? It wouldn’t be the end of the world. True, we’d lose our house, but there were some lovely underpasses around Orlando we could call home.
I turned to find Christina, who was farther down the hall speaking with Mr. Brown Eyes. I pulled her away with a tight smile, avoiding eye contact with him. The last thing I needed was someone who already looked down on my work experience hearing that I had to leave early for a kid emergency. I couldn’t afford the distraction of his disapproval.
I was a mom. A master of organization and prioritization. And right now, I needed to focus on canceling my meetings and making it over to the school before my impulsive daughter got kicked out of kindergarten.
I’d just focus on the problem at hand and leave tomorrow’s problems—like the judgy gaze of a certain coworker burning into my back—for tomorrow.
Chapter 2
Mondays hadn’t heldmeaning for me in years. When your sole job is to take care of your children, Mondays are no different from any other day of the week. The routine is the same: get them up, get them fed, entertain them, teach them, feed them some more, put them to bed, and pray they stay asleep.
I’d forgotten how quickly the weekend went when you had somewhere to be on Monday. But here I was, bright and early, frantically trying to make breakfast for Clara and Sophie before running to work.