Page 85 of Mayhem At Prescott High (The Havoc Boys 3)
Yes, but Bernie loves you the way you are. If it took losing everything to have her, then you’ll have gained a lot, Cal.
“I don’t need an escort,” Oscar quips, flaunting the rules of Havoc like he always does. He thinks he’s invincible. Well, he will until one day he just … isn’t. That’s how I discovered my mortality: by losing my invincibility. I smile, because it seems to freak people out when I do that. Maybe they can sense that I’m always just this close to losing it?
“Why are you here?” Bernie bites out, her hair still a bit tangled, her face still a bit flushed. She glances my way, and I can feel my smile turning into something darker, but with more meaning. She lights me up inside in a way that I can’t explain. I suppose that some things require no explanation; they just are. That’s Bernadette to me. I have always loved her, but it seems pretty self-explanatory as to why I do.
She’s strong. She’s got conviction. She acts like she doesn’t care when she cares a whole hell of a lot.
Also, she’s mine now, just like I’ve always wanted.
I look back at Oscar and find his gray eyes narrowed. He can tell we just fucked; I know he can.
“Yeah, we just had sex for the first time. And guess what?” she asks, tilting her head slightly to one side. “Callum didn’t get up and run away.”
I bark out a laugh and they both jump slightly. Pretty impressive, I must say, to get a reaction out of Oscar at all. Either I really am a bigger monster than him, or else Bernadette has thrown him so far off his game that he’s making mistakes.
“How lovely for the pair of you; I’ll start planning your future commitment ceremony.” Oscar turns back to me with a sharp frown etched into his face. I think he should tell Bernadette the truth, about being a virgin and what-the-fuck-ever. I mean, if what Hael said is really true. He neither confirmed nor denied it.
My body itches with the need to move, but I’ve had plenty of practice at sitting still, too. All those nights on Bernie’s roof, my fingers pressed to her window, my heart in my throat. Today, we’ve made it official. Today, I’ve cemented the fact that I’m most definitely the character that has to die. I’d do it happily, too, sacrifice myself to keep her safe.
It’d be an honor.
I chuckle and Oscar’s frown gets even deeper.
“We need to get clothes, for the winter formal,” he says, like the very idea of attending the dance or the afterparty makes him want to throw his body off of a cliff. “I can’t wait until we graduate, and this nonsense is behind us.”
“Oh, come on,” I say with a grin, tossing an arm around Bernie’s shoulders and bringing her close so I can smell her sweet hair. Peaches and leather, that’s her signature scent. I could exist solely on the scent of her, on the brightness of her smile, on the sassy sway of her walk. I am truly infatuated with her, likely to the point of unhealthy obsession, but nobody needs to know that, now do they? “This could be fun. We get to show off our girl, make a few freshmen piss themselves, maybe kill a couple of Mitch’s friends in the shadows.”
Oscar doesn’t look amused at my joke.
“Are we going to an actual store this time?” Bernadette asks, snuggling closer to me. Oscar watches us with a burning jealousy in his gaze that he masks with a look of vitriolic indifference. “Or some teen mom’s trailer?”
“We’ll steal what we need,” Oscar explains, turning away and heading down the sidewalk like he expects us to follow after him. Hmm. I look down at Bernadette at the same moment she looks up at me.
“Is he just broken on the inside or something?” she asks, and I shrug. I have the urge to gather her up in my hoodie, snuggle her into the folds, and murder anyone who dares look at her wrong. Why not just do it then, Cal? You don’t have to hold back anymore. She’s ready to see who you really are. I gather Bernie close, enveloping her in my arms and putting my head atop hers, so that she’s completely wrapped up, completely protected.
“If he is, does it matter?” I ask, but she doesn’t answer. I know what she’d say though, if she bothered to tell me the truth: no, it doesn’t. Because we are her heart, just as she is ours. We beat and bleed together. “Come on, let’s get this over with, so we can go back to Aaron’s and fuck some more.”
Bernie hits me in the chest, but it’s a playful smack. When she reaches up her fingers to play with the scars on my throat, I let her. Only she can touch them. They are only for her.
