Page 67 of Mayhem At Prescott High (The Havoc Boys 3)
It’s no secret that students come here to eat first, and then fuck later.
The owners of the drive-in are from South Prescott, so they’re well-aware of how things work around here.
Aaron turns back to me, and there’s something different about his face. There’s no less kindness or affection in it, but there is an intensity that I feel like he was holding back before. It’s in his gaze when he looks at me, cutting through the bullshit and stabbing me through the heart like an arrow. Once again, I forget to breathe, and the joint goes out.
Neither of us says a word as he flicks the wheel on the lighter again and leans forward. This time, though, he doesn’t manage to even touch the flame to the joint. Instead, his tattooed right hand finds the back of my neck, and he pulls me forward, forcing me to meet his mouth if I want the privilege of kissing him.
This is the Aaron that I saw on homecoming night, the one that I fucked even though I knew I shouldn’t.
“All I want is to be selfish,” Aaron murmurs, which is very nearly the opposite of what Hael told me. “All I want is for you and me to just cut and run from here, so we can be together, and fuck the rest of the world.” I try to turn away, but Aaron won’t let me. He keeps me there, our mouths pressed close but not quite kissing, not yet. He holds it over me, making me want it even more. “Let’s be selfish tonight, just me and you, Bern. Let’s pretend.”
“We don’t have to pretend, Aaron,” I whisper back, closing my eyes tight and trying to keep my shit together.
Aaron Atlas Fadler.
I once described him as a liar, a cheater, a hypocrite.
But then …
Liar.
He said he loved me, but I thought he didn’t; I see now, in the fierceness of his feral gaze, that I was wrong.
Cheater.
I felt like he betrayed me, cheated on me with a monster worse than a woman, a five-headed hydra named Havoc. Yet, as I sit here now, enveloped in their dark arms, I can see that there was never really another choice. We always have to choose Havoc because it means choosing family.
Hypocrite.
He fucked me the same night he told me I was nothing to him. He stripped my dress off and let me walk home in the dark in nothing but a bra and panties … then later, he tore even those off and took me. Over and over and over again. I asked myself many times if that night was a mistake, but … maybe it wasn’t?
Maybe it was foreshadowing for the direction my life was going to take? The road was never straight and narrow, but we got here, didn’t we? We found each other, even with the sharp turns, the wicked curves, the blind spots, and the accidents in the road.
Aaron Atlas Fadler.
He's worse than all the others.
When I look at him, I’m not just obsessed. I’m anxious to see what we might find around the corner. I’m achy and missing the way his lips tasted when we had our first kiss. Mostly, I’m in love.
I never stopped being in love.
“We never have to pretend again,” I whisper and there it is, this strange fracturing inside my chest, like I’m losing the very last wall that there was left. Victor has backed down; the boys seem to be in agreement.
Our girl.
Tease her.
Piss her off.
Make love to her.
Fuck her.
They said they wanted me to be their plaything, didn’t they?
So be it.
They also said they wanted me to be their accomplice: check and double check.
“Bernadette,” Aaron groans, and then he’s pulling back and shoving open his door. For a split-second there, I feel panic take flight in my chest. He can’t leave me like Oscar did; that isn’t like him. Aaron is a lifeline. He’s the one all the other guys should thank because without him, I couldn’t put up with them and their shit and their all-consuming blackness. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
I watch as Aaron yanks the rear door open and climbs in, his arm snaking between the front seats and grabbing my waist. Without preamble, he yanks me back and into him, tucking me into his lap and then dropping his mouth to mine like a comet. All fast heat and pressure and impact. His tongue thrusts between my lips, sliding across my tongue, tasting me.
More than that even: savoring me.
“Victor might be your husband, but I’ll always be your first love. Your first time. Bernadette, I swear to god, if he ever tries to keep us apart again, I will fucking kill him.” I nod because I can’t speak, not when Aaron’s growling against my lips and holding me like he was always meant to.
