Page 59 of Altered By Lead (Undercover Sinners 2)
He trails off, and I'm hanging by a damn thread.
I take another gulp of the sports drink and lick my lips eagerly. "Or what?"
"Or you can take your punishment in here, instead." He tips his head to the dresser under the window, and I gasp when I see the assortment of toys he's laid out. Were they all for me? Or had he bought them with Janet in mind?
Jealousy is a poisonous bitch, but it burns in my veins nonetheless.
"So, what's it going to be, pet?" Hawke fucking purrs the question at me. "One of the boys? Or my girl?"
"Convenient, how you want me to be your girl all of a sudden," I say with a breeziness that I don't feel inside. There's nothing I want more in that moment than to wrap my lips around Hawke's thick cock and take him deep, show him exactly what this little Russian princess can do. "And when it's convenient to kick my ass, it's all recruit this, recruit that."
The smirk that takes over his face is equal parts infuriating and attractive; I'm a prisoner to it, whether I like it or not. If I let them, these guys will take over me, burn the rest of what's left of the old Natalia to flames. But is that really such a bad thing?
I toss the sports drink aside and reach up to wrap my fingers around the base of Hawke's shaft. He stops me with a hand on the wrist.
"None of that snarky shit. I want to hear you say it. Portia wasn't afraid to give in to all of this."
"And what's all of this?" I retort back, hating hearing her name on his lips. While Janet is here, and clearly interested in Hawke, she's less of a threat than the memory of a woman I never met. Hawke and I both know that. "I'm not afraid," I say, before he even gets the chance to answer my question.
Hawke takes a step back and sinks to his knees on the bed for a moment, eye to eye with me.
"I'm going to tell you this before another one of those assholes takes the chance away from me," he says, running his hand up and down the length of his cock, teasing my trembling body with the motion. He pauses for a moment, and our gazes connect. I realize this is as close to an epiphany as we're going to get. "Do you know why I made that bet?"
"Why?" I ask dryly, cocking a single brow. "Because you're a controlling asshole who likes to play with people's lives?"
"Because I didn't want to like you. If you were a game, then it didn't matter. But for whatever stupid reason, it does." He licks his lips as I move forward, fully prepared to get on my hands and knees and suck him off. I want it; we both do. But Hawke grabs my hair before I can even get close and lifts my face up to look at him. "You're not like Portia, Natalia. That's why we've been holding back. She was in this too deep, and it got her killed."
"My father is the head of the Russian mafia," I snap, pushing his hand away from my hair and sitting up on my knees again. It's weird, to have a conversation naked and wanting like this, but somehow I feel like it keeps us both honest. There is literally nothing to hide behind in here. Just me, Hawke, and a bunch of bullshit to wade through. "I'm in as deep as I can go," I say, pausing as he works his jaw in frustration and sighs.
"We're all broken, stupid assholes," Hawke admits, surprising me. "And we're not good with this sort of shit. I thought if I ignored you, this ... whatever the fuck it is, would go away. But it hasn't." He flicks his attention away for a moment before turning back to me. "It won't."
"This ... whatever the fuck it is?" I repeat questioningly, and then we both pause as a knock sounds on the door.
"Boss?" It's Mace. There's no mistaking the deep rumbling of his voice, like a mountain shifting across the landscape, heavy but effortless.
"Come in," Hawke says, keeping his gaze focused on mine. The door opens and Mace steps in, filling up the entire doorway, his dark blue eyes narrowing as he spots the two of us, naked and aroused, sweating and shaking with need.
Also, he looks pissed. Royally so.
"Pardon me, boss," he bites out, "but I thought you were leaving Natalia alone for the time being?" There's a question in his voice as he steps into the room and closes the door behind us. The sound of the lock clicking into place is distinct.
"And I thought she was going to make me work for it," Hawke says with another smirk. "Sometimes people change their minds."
