Page 56 of Altered By Fire (Undercover Sinners 1)
"How about Hawke Security, but with an 'E'," I add, because that's pretty much how we refer to ourselves. My tongue runs across my lower lip on accident, and I lean back in the chair, my cock hardening and lengthening inside my black cargo pants. Can't help it. When I look at Natalia, everything inside of me just seems to spring to life. And when I say everything, I mean everything.
"Hawke Security," she says, tucking some hair behind her ear and taking another sip of coffee. "I can work with that. So. Tell me about this Portia chick. Who was she?"
"She was an ex-marine who also worked as a psych nurse. She's the one who … well, let Arsen out of his cage so to speak. She literally freed him from a mental institution and they went on the run together."
Natalia looks up at me with this wild expression of confusion, like she's never heard anything so bizarre in her damn life. And this, coming from the daughter of a Russian mob boss. Yep. She's clearly fallen for Arsen's charms, too. I can tell that without even asking, and it makes me curl my lip. I know what women see when they look at the handsome, tattooed son of a bitch. But does she know how goddamn dangerous he is?
Does she know how goddamn dangerous I am?
"Okay," Natalia hazards, turning to face me, her knee bumping mine and making me shiver. Hawke commanded me to fuck her, but I want it to be more than that. I want her to want me, to put some trust in me even though I don't deserve it. Because the things I like to do in bed require a whole hell of a lot of trust.
"The two of them started running con jobs until they picked the wrong mark—a man that Hawke had already been hired to deal with. He caught them both, but just barely. And then offered them jobs. I was already working for him at the time, but Colt and Weston came along later."
"So why does everyone talk about Portia like she was some sort of goddess?" Natalia asks, her voice husky and inviting. I want to sink into it and swim, let myself drown and then drag her under right along with me.
"She was our …" Words fail me. I'm not big on words. I'm not a man who likes to talk much at all, really. "She was ours."
That's about all I want to say on the matter. Portia lived and worked with five straight men who didn't get out much, and she had a healthy appetite for sex. Maybe not as healthy as Natalia's, but strong, vibrant … creative. She wanted to please us, and we all wanted to fuck her. Hawke and Arsen … there was something more there between them and Portia, something I never quite got to experience.
I wonder if I might be experiencing it now.
"You want me to join your team … and be yours, too?" she asks me after a long, quiet moment, looking up at me from under a thick fall of dark lashes. "Is that what this is? You're making me Portia's replacement?"
"Hawke says you want to kill yourself," I tell her blatantly, because what the fuck is that all about? She can't kill herself, not when I've just decided I like her. Mace … doesn't like people easily. I can be mild-mannered, I can take care of shit, but I'd rather kill most people than smile at them.
It's easier to put a gun to someone's head and pull the trigger than it is to deal with all the bullshit that comes with human emotion.
"I don't want my father to get ahold of me." Natalia looks up, her amber-brown eyes meeting mine with this pleading, desperate sort of look. "If he does, I don't even know if I'll get the pleasure of dying. I'll be a bird in a gilded cage, a doll in a fancy little house. He'll play with me, he'll let his men play with me …" Her voice trails off, and she shakes her head, putting her fingers to her temples. "So if it's between death and Daddy, I choose death."
"What if it was between death and joining us?" I ask, tapping my fingers on the tabletop. The wind twists around the church spires, teasing my skin with icy gusts. Natalia shivers, but I don't budge. I just sit there and stare at her. "If you're going to give your life up anyway, why not give this a try?"
"I am giving it a try," she defends, giving me this saucy little look that makes the beast inside my chest growl. He wants her. He wants her so goddamn badly, like a male that's found his mate. And he'll do anything to have her. "I shot my father's own men and saved Weston, trained with Hawke, fucked everybody here except …"
