“Did you just screw him?” he shouts, but I’m shaking my head and then covering my face with my hands. “I thought you didn’t believe in these stupid Infinity Club bets? I get what you’re trying to do, but to go so far? To fuck a guy you hate? How could you, Marnye?”
“He … we were just kissing, and he …” I have no idea what to say, and I end up dropping my arms by my sides. Zack just stares at me and swallows hard. When he kisses me, I let him. I let him sweep my wet body up against his, and I love being in his arms so much that I’m … confused.
Did I cheat on Zack with Creed? Or am I cheating on Creed with Zack? Did I cheat on either of them when I kissed Tristan? Oh god. I’m not a cheater. I hate cheaters. Jennifer is a cheater. I can’t be.
“How are you going to choose?”
Miranda asked me that question last year. I hated it then. I hate it even more now.
I push Zack away from me, wrap my towel around my shoulders, and run all the way back to my dorm.“Whatever you did,” Miranda says, as I eat my food as fast as I can. I just want to finish my meal and get out of The Mess before Tristan, Zayd, Creed, Zack, or Windsor shows up. Is that too much to ask? “Creed is now obsessed with you.” I choke on a cherry tomato, but I can’t ignore the slight accusation in her words.
“Are you okay?” I ask, and she sighs, putting her elbows on the table and resting her chin in her palms.
“You must be up to something. There’s no way you’d forgive my brother quite so easily.” I stab another piece of lettuce and bring it to my lips. “I believe you when you say you didn’t sleep with him, but whatever happened … I don’t think you even understood it. Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
“I told you,” I whisper, keeping my voice low. There are other students eating in the restaurant with us, but they’re all Plebs. We’re relatively safe, but I don’t doubt any overheard conversation will make it back to Harper. “He just … came.” Miranda wrinkles her nose and looks at me in horror.
“Please stop saying that. It’s so freaking gross. That’s my brother. My twin. I don’t want to hear about his … eww. Just no.” She sighs and sits up straight, pausing as the door opens and … Zack walks in. Oh fantastic. He spots me right away and makes a beeline straight for this table. Would it be wrong if I just got up and ran?
He sits down next to me, and awkward silence descends.
“Can we have a moment alone?” Zack asks, and Miranda rolls her eyes.
“Yeah, sure. Babe, come find me later and we’ll all watch RuPaul in Andrew’s room, okay?” I nod, and she takes off. I stare at my salad while I wait for Zack to talk.
“Are you mad at me?” he asks, and my head jerks up and around. My brows are crinkled, and I’m so beyond confused I don’t quite know what to say.
“Aren’t you mad at me?” I ask, and he sighs, jaw clenching as he looks away. “I … did that with Creed, and …”
“I already told you, we can’t be together. I don’t fucking deserve you, Marnye. It was wrong of me to react like that. I know there’s no future for us.” My heart drops, and I want to scream. There could be a future for us, you idiot! Fight for me. But at the same time, I feel like a cheater who doesn’t deserve Zack. I feel like my mom.
“I cheated on you,” I choke, and he spins to face me with his eyes wide.
“Cheated? You can’t cheat on someone you’re not with.” He stares at me with so much longing that my heart begins to pound, and I feel like I might pass out. Things only get worse when the Idol boys stroll into the room and spot us there in the corner.
Tristan’s nostrils flare at the sight of Zack, Creed immediately makes his way over to me, and Zayd gives a cute, little wave.
Crap. Crap, crap, crap.
I shoot up from my chair, heart pounding, as Creed puts an arm on either side of me and pins me to the wall.
“Avoiding me won’t do you any good,” he says, and I think I forget my own name for a minute there.
“I wasn’t avoiding you,” I whisper, wondering how much he’s told Tristan and Zayd. The other two look a bit confused, to be honest. “I just … I have a lot going on, okay?” Creed narrows his eyes on me and then glances at Zack like he’s garbage.
