Page 114 of One Last Rainy Day
But I did see it, along with her fight to remain upright, visibly shaken by the sight of Sean and me. There was longing mixed with incredulity in her eyes—like she had been starving for the sight of us but never thought the day would come. That was proof enough that Tobias failed to take either of our places in her heart.
Even if that’s a fact,it’s too late.
Too late.
Keeping my focus, I draw another jagged inhale as her confession rings clear in my ears. “I waited for you. I made myself sick. I cried for you both every night for months. I waited and waited, and you never came for me.”
Though I credited myself with personal growth before we landed, I lashed out at her in a mix of hurt, anger, and jealousy—which Cecelia rightfully called me out for. I turned my back on it all then, and she cried out. She called after me, begging me not to go—the same way she had in that alley—pinning me with the same words. “Don’t, Dominic. Please don’t go.”
Even if I lost my place with her, she still didn’t want to give up on me. She wanted to understand what happened and, more so, how I could walk away from her—from us.“You mean to tell me you’ve been waiting this whole time to come back to me?”
“I chose wrong,” I admit hoarsely, drawing my knee up and resting my forearms on them while gritting my teeth through another blow.
My brother purposefully led her to believe we left her by choice, making her think it was our decision. That was the last nail in his coffin, and we all felt it hammer home. I thought that was the worst of it until Sean nailed Cecelia with both accusation and statement.“You love him.”
She didn’t deny it...because she couldn’t.
It was obvious my brother found his salvation in her the way I had—his refuge. Only last night, I was in that hostel feeling sorry for him. Pitying the fact that he had no idea what it was like to experience reciprocal love.
He knows now, along with how terrifying the idea is of losing it.
Especially losing her affection,her, period. Which is my current reality.
“I fucked up,” I choke out, palming the back of my head, trying my best to absorb the break happening inside me.
My brother’s heart may have matured, but by his actions tonight, it was obvious that when it came to Cecelia, it had grown into something dangerously possessive. He had come to King’s frantic, begging us not to withdraw our protection one second and condemning us the next.
“...you two idiots parading around like men, like soldiers, when you don’t know a fucking thing about sacrifice. And with her, you sacrificed nothing! Not a fucking thing! Until you know what that is, you aren’t capable of being the man she needs...and you know all too fucking well that you lost her the minute you shared her.”That blow was for Sean, and I knew he felt it before Tobias fixed his gaze on me.“And chose this life over her.”
Guilty.
Of all of it.
Tobias had succeeded where Sean and I had failed—he’d chosen her. He’d put her first, before himself, before the club, before us.
I lost the best thing that ever happened to me because of that failure while discovering one of the most damning truths about the four-letter curse—about love—which is that you don’t know how significant or powerful it is until you lose it.
The breeze kicks up, increasing the sting on my face, and I’m thankful for the physical pain, even for a second, to detract from what’s happening inside me.
Gathering myself from the floor, limbs heavy, I walk over to the bed. With every step, she comes more into view, and it’s the sight of her, so unnaturally still, that crushes me. Moving a pile of folded clothes to perch at the edge of it, I soak in every inch of her sleeping form, knowing she won’t rouse because of the drugs pumping through her.
Because Tobias carried through with his threat and marked her.
I pulled up in an attempt to stop it just as I spotted Jimmy’s SUV. Jimmy was the one who inked us all, and I knew the second I saw him pulling out of Roman’s gate that I was too late.
Too late.
Too late, and my brother wasn’t even fucking here.
He didn’t even give her the choice.
He just...claimed her.
More to add to the list of shit I can’t forgive him for.
Staring down, I drink in her perfection the way I have a dozen times or more as she sleeps. As she dreams, and for a time, she was mine.
She was mine.
