Page 113 of One Last Rainy Day
—Tobias,The Finish Line
Chapter Forty-Three
SLUMPED AGAINST THEdoor, head tilted back, eyes fixed, I absorb the night noise. Cicadas sound in the distance, in serenade with the crickets. The rustling of trees announces the light wind before it filters in, cooling my skin as the scuff on my outstretched boot becomes magnified by the filtering moonlight.
I miss none of it.
Where the world used to blur and time lapsed past me unnoticed, I’m fully attuned to it now.
Aware of every ragged breath I draw along with the distorted beat that steadily drums in my chest—despite its current inhabitable state. The overwhelming burn in my throat intensifies as I keep my focus while the ache webs its way through every vein, pumped further in by every broken beat.
The cool breeze whispers in again, gliding over my profile and arms, cruelly denying a shift in temperature, lacking any sign of a storm.
There’s not a single cloud in the moon-absorbed sky, a convenient view accessible to my right. A view that I rejectwith my whole being to keep the one I have. I have no use for the heavens anymore, no more questions to ask the cosmos, no future to ponder because they delivered my fate today.
A future without rain.
Without her.
As it turns out, hell isn’t discriminatory about geographic location but is, in fact, a state meant for me to endure wherever I may roam. That truth made evident today when it faithfully followed me home to watch me shatter on impact.
It was the sight of his Jag parked behind what we could only assume was Cecelia’s Jeep that tipped us off. After Sean and I shared a loaded look in the driveway, Tobias’s laugh reached us where we stood, ringing out from somewhere in the backyard. The sound of it drew us in and had us creeping through the gate, past the pool and garden, only to be slammed by the sight of what greeted us.
Closing my eyes, the sting intensifies in my throat, the thump in my raw chest serving as a reminder while the image of them surfaces.
Cecelia lying beneath my brother, wearing next to nothing. Tobias, bare-chested, in his briefs, staring down at her like she was everything he ever wanted.
It was apparent by the intimate exchange that they were more than familiar with the other physically. With timing being everything, it seemed Sean and I arrived in the nick of time to witness them in the midst of falling and confessing. My brother’s declaration being the first.“You warned me not to fall in love with you. You said you wouldn’t make room for me.”
“You told me you wouldn’t.”Cecelia’s heartfelt replyserved as a sledgehammer, driving in the reality playing out in front of us.
I didn’t have to see the look in her eyes to know she was giving her heart to him...a heart that could never be mine again. So, when he opened his mouth to voice his reply, I took the opportunity to personally deliver his karma.
Grunting through the pain, I shake my head to try and disburse the sight of them—to no avail.
So, this is heartbreak.
The word seems weak in comparison to the feeling.
Obliteratedfeels more fitting.Insignificantas well, in the sense that it seemed our time together meant fuck all to her—at least from where I stood this morning, watching her give her love away...to my brother.
My gut feeling in France had proven to be on point, and as I feared and deep downknew, I lost my place with her during and because of my absence.
“Where have you been?”
That question hadn’t surprised me as much as the discovery that the man I looked up to my whole life—whom I respected and revered—was only too happy to keep that answer hidden so he could take my place.
My brother stole my ignorant bliss.
The hardest part?
I let him.
Eyes stinging, I scrub my face against my T-shirt sleeve to clear my vision, unwilling to lose a second of the time I’m stealing.
My anger for my brother can be easily conjured, but my fury for her is much harder to find. Cecelia had been just as blindsided today.
If I hadn’t seen her learn of his deception—hadn’t witnessed or heard firsthand the lengths Tobias went to in an effort to keep her in the dark—then maybe I could hate her.
