Page 47 of Sinner's Steel
“That’s a huge risk and a lot of cash,” Cade said. “I mean, what if he cooks up a bad meal and Viper decides to off him ’cause he doesn’t like shrimp?”
“You ever have a bad meal at Mario’s?” Gunner licked his lips. “He’s a genius. The things he can do with salmon are fucking sinful.”
“Christ. We’re not interested in hearing about your kink,” Sparky said, his nose wrinkling in mock disgust.
Zane bit back a smile. “Maybe Mario shoulda thought about the risk when he borrowed fifty grand from the Jacks.” Just like he should have thought about the risk of what he’d done with Evie last night. But she was as much an addiction for him as gambling clearly was for Mario, and one taste wasn’t enough.
Jagger drummed his fingers on the boardroom table, once a fancy dining table, now carved with the Sinner logo and stained with coffee rings. “Without the restaurant to pay off the debt, he’s out of options. He knows the Jacks will be coming to him for the money, and with all the connections they have now there’s nowhere he can run. I like the plan. Everyone vote.” All hands went up and Cade and Tank offered to pay Mario a discreet visit that afternoon.
“Don’t forget the party tonight,” Jagger said after he officially ended the meeting. “We’re having it at Sparky’s shop instead of Rider’s Bar because it’s more secure.”
“It’s not right,” Tank grumbled. “We shouldn’t be partying when T-Rex is being held prisoner.”
“I hear you, brother.” Jagger clapped him on the shoulder. “But this is the best way to get everyone fired up about the rescue mission, and to make sure we’re all still thinking about T-Rex. This party is about him. We’re gonna toast him and pledge to do what it takes to bring him back. But we’re going to need that Sinner bond to be as damned strong as it can be before we go in. I’ve made one last offer to Viper. If he turns it down and we have to raid the Black Jack clubhouse to get him out, I can’t promise all of us will come back without a few scratches.”
After the meeting broke up, Zane headed down to the basement with Dax to interrogate Doreen. Assuming T-Rex was in the Black Jack clubhouse, they needed more information before launching a full-on assault, and Doreen was the key to getting T-Rex out alive.
“These are the moments I live for,” Dax said as they descended the stairs to the basement. “Torture sessions and the time I spend with my family.”
“You’re one sick fuck.” And yet, last night with Evie… this morning with Ty… he wouldn’t trade those moments for the world. But Evie kept trying to push him away. Should he respect her wishes and back off? What the fuck did he know about being a dad? Or being in a relationship when his loyalty was to the club? Christ, it was all fucked up. Good thing he was with a brother who specialized in this very thing.
“So, I got this friend…”
“You don’t have friends.” Dax laughed as they stepped out into the games room. “You have brothers. And brothers look out for each other. Jagger already told me what went down ‘cause he was worried about you, and he didn’t want anyone getting hurt.” He paused at the bottom of the stairs. “So, to recap, you found your long lost girl who turns out to be Viper’s girl. You decided to steal her away, but you don’t know if you want her or she wants you. You got a son you didn’t know about, and the whole shebang scares the shit out of you ’cause who the hell can prepare themselves to be a dad when they don’t even know it’s coming?”
Zane bristled. “I’m not scared.”
“Then you’re not human.” Dax ran his hand through his dark hair, slicked back to show off his widow’s, peak. “I was scared shitless the first time Sandy got pregnant, and I had nine months to prepare and the love of my life to catch me when I fell. And boy did I fall. First month, I took every job Jagger had on offer just to get away. But Sandy set me straight. One night I came home and she dumped Jett in my arms and told me it was her turn for a month off. Then she walked out the door. I didn’t know she was just stayin’ next door with her friend. But hell, by the end of the night, Jett was still breathing, and I was feeling pretty damn good about myself. Sandy came back the next day and I told Jagger I’d be slowing things down for a while.”
“He’s not a baby.” Zane leaned against the worn pool table that had seen one too many games. His gaze flicked to the wet bar in the corner. If he didn’t need his wits about him to interrogate Doreen, he would be over there pouring himself a shot of the good stuff. “He’s eight. I missed…” His throat tightened. “All that.”
Dax’s face softened. “Yeah, you did. And the way Jag tells it, that’s another burden you have to bear. Who we are as teenagers isn’t who we are as men. We don’t have the maturity or even a sense of responsibility under our belts. They say the male brain doesn’t fully develop until we hit twenty-five, and I’d say that’s about right. Women on the other hand are born mature. That’s why they can so easily fuck us over. They’ve got years of practice before we come into our own.”
“Evie…” Zane toed the concrete floor with his boot. When they’d first done the reno of the new clubhouse, they’d put down industrial carpet, but after a few parties, a couple of orgies, and a few fistfights, they’d decided to rip it up and go back to the basics. “She had a hard time growing up. And in the end, everyone abandoned her, including me and Jag. She doesn’t trust me. She thinks I’m gonna leave her again.”
“Are you?”
“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “I keep thinking maybe she’s better off without me. I’m not a family man. Didn’t have any role models for how that kind of thing works. She was doing okay before I came along, and she doesn’t want to be involved in our life. But then there’s Ty. I’m not about to abandon my son. I wanna do right by them. I just don’t know what right is.”
Dax lifted the key from the hook beside the door. “You’ve got to figure that one out. When people are abandoned, they wind up with a need to feel safe and secure, but they can’t trust anyone because the people who were supposed to love them let them down. So they push everyone away. If you want her, you need to make her feel secure. She won’t feel that way if it looks like you got one foot out the door.”
Well, hell. Here he’d been thinking only about Evie, but Dax could have been talking about him. He’d never thought about being abandoned as a kid. His life was the way it was, with a mom gone and a dad who didn’t give a shit about anything but drugs. He’d never really seen the parallel between Evie’s alcoholic mother and his druggie father, but it was right there, staring him in the face. They’d bonded over a loss they hadn’t realized was a loss at all. They’d found safety and security in each other’s arms.
Dax paused, one hand on the door. “Not that I like intruding on people’s lives—okay, actually I do—but, there’s something else.”
“She’s gotta forgive me.”
“No. You have to forgive yourself.”
***
“Viper doesn’t want me back, does he? That’s why you’re here.” Doreen folded her arms and leaned against the wall. She had taken off her cut and tied her hair up in a ponytail, bringing the dark circles under her blue eyes, and her pale skin into sharp relief. But as with all old ladies, appearances could be deceiving, and so far she’d shown herself to be vicious, cunning and resourceful, all of which meant Zane had to stay alert.
“He has one our brothers,” he said. “We offered him a trade, and he turned us down. He said if you were stupid enough to get caught, he’d kill you himself if you showed up at his club.” Zane didn’t pull his punches. She needed to know she was alive now only by the grace of the Sinners.
“I’m not as stupid as he thinks,” she muttered, half to herself, but Zane didn’t miss the pain that flickered across her face.
He pulled up the chair across from her bed and rested his elbows on his knees, studying her body language—legs stretched out on the floor, ankles crossed, leaning back on her hands. Certainly not the language of fear.
