Page 49 of Dirty Diana
His eyes get glassy, like he might cry. Instead he holds up a finger “Wait! One more thing!” Barry rushes to the cooler in his van and comes back with a bag of cocktail weenies. “Don’t eat them cold.”
“Only Alicia would do such a thing.”
He hugs me tight. It would be nice to stay right here. “Don’t stop making stuff, okay?” he whispers into my hair.
“Never.” I kiss his cheek and get into the car. I know he’s watching as I drive away, but I don’t look in my rearview mirror until Santa Fe is miles behind me.
Santa Fe,
New Mexico
—
Now
Chapter 15
—
After I hang up with Alicia, I can’t sleep. I book a flight from Dallas to Albuquerque for early the next morning, pack my suitcase, then sit at the kitchen table and watch the sun coming up.
The plane is mostly empty, and without having to hold extra snacks for Emmy or Oliver’s neck pillow, my bag fits easily under the seat. I lean my head against the window and doze most of the way, thinking about New Mexico and what I might be going back to. I haven’t let myself think about Jasper or my Santa Fe life in so long.
As soon as the plane touches down, I text Oliver.
Landed.
K. Good luck.
We’ve barely spoken since he told me his secret. I saw him briefly this morning and left for the airport moments later.
I text Alicia.
LANDED!!
And she responds
!!!!!
On the curb outside the airport, she screams, “Dirty Diana!” and pulls me into her. “I’ve missed you likecrazy.” She hugs me like she never learned that you’re supposed to hold back. And I realize I’ve missed her like crazy too.
As we’re driving the hour to Alicia’s house in Santa Fe, memories come flooding back. We pass dozens of places where we catered events with Barry. We pass the Cross Gallery where I first met Jasper, and I can’t help staring. It has a fresh coat of paint and new plantings out front but otherwise looks the same. At a red light, Alicia taps her fingers against the steering wheel, her wedding band making a faint tapping sound in time with the music. I glance at her profile—she’s only gotten more beautiful, any hard angles filled in and softened. She seems so at home in Santa Fe. As soon as grad school was over, Alicia moved back here and started teaching film classes at the university and she never left again. What if Oliver and Emmy and I did the same? What if we picked up and moved here now? Would I feel more at ease too?
We pass the turnoff for Jasper’s old house and I wonder where he is right now. All this time, I’ve resisted the urge to look him up, even though it would be so easy to do.
The rest of downtown speeds past us until Alicia pulls in to the driveway of a small adobe home. When she opens the front door, her three-year-old, Elvis, comes running across the polished wood floor. “Mama!” Elvis throws his arms around Alicia’s legs and she swings him up and he wraps his legs around her waist.
She kisses Elvis on his cheek and announces, “Auntie D is here!”
“Hi.” Elvis places a chubby hand on each of my cheeks and presses them together until my lips purse.
“Sorry. It’s his favorite greeting.” Alicia’s husband, Nico, appears and plucks Elvis up and throws him, giggling, over his shoulder.
“Oh, Elvis.” I sigh and look at his upside-down face. “I amsohappy to see you.”
Nico gives me a warm hug, nearly as tight as Alicia’s. His eyes are a deep green and he has the same rosy red lips and wide smile as Alicia, only a little less mischievous than hers. Nico asks me to remind him how I take my coffee then takes my bag to the guest room while Alicia shows me around the house.
In her sun-drenched backyard, we sit on a bench and watch Elvis sway on his stomach on a wooden swing hung from their elm tree. My sunglasses are somewhere inside; the bright light burns my naked eyes, and I have the most disorienting feeling of having traveled from one world to another. Wherever I am now feels both familiar and alien.
