Page 65 of Drive Me Wild
The plan is to convince Josie this is more than just a fuck or a fling for me. This is now a forever sort of thing.
I seeJosie around the paddock and hotel, but it isn’t until we’re watching a movie alone in her hotel room the night before the race that I carry out my plan. And then blow it all to hell moments later when I open my mouth and state, “You’re a cat.”
Josie’s face scrunches up adorably and she tilts her head. Tugging at the strings on her jumper—that features my last name and number, thank you very much—she says, “What?”
“You’re my cat.”
Nice, Walker. Way to clarify things.
“Is this your way of saying you want me to role play as a cat,” Josie muses unsurely. “Because, um, I’m not sure how I feel about that. I mean, cats are cute and all, but I’m more of a dog person and?—”
“No, let me start over.” I take a deep breath, hoping my mind will stay in one lane and not do its typical routine of trying to fit twelve topics into one sentence. “Blake once made me watch this god-awful documentary on cats. In my defense, I had just taken an edible, and he could’ve asked me to stare at a wall and I would’ve agreed. It was actually a pretty good doc, though. I ended up crying over this little kitten named Annabelle who… you know what? Never mind. The point is, that it went on and on about how cats rub against objects to claim ownership. You’re like a cat. Now that you’ve rubbed on me, I’m one of your belongings. I don’t think I ever stood a chance.”
Josie opens her mouth but doesn’t say anything. Instead, her fingers tug at the delicate gold chain on her neck. “Um, okay. Well, thank you. I think?”
Not off to a great start, Walker.
“I don’t want you seeing other people,” I try again. “Or me. I don’t want either of us seeing other people.”
“Oh.” She pulls her necklace so hard I worry she may break it in half. Really not off to a good start. “To be honest, I thought that we were already kind of exclusively hooking up. But, um, I guess we never really clarified, so I guess it’s fine if you’ve been doing your thing or whatever. I haven’t been seeing anyone else, though. I’ve been focusing on myself and all that. Kind of rules out the whole dating thing, you know?”
My heart hammers in my chest at her words. “But aren’t we dating?”
“We’re friends with benefits. I mean, that’s what you suggested and what we both agreed to.”
“Is that all we are, though?”
Josie blinks up at me, her brown eyes narrowing as she searches my face. “I-I don’t know.”
“You don’t know if we’re dating or not?”
“I’m confused, Theo. Why are you asking me all this?”
“Because I want to be with you, Jos.” For good measure I add, “As more than just a friend you have sex with.”
Her pouty mouth widens into an “O,” but she doesn’t say anything. At the very least, I was expecting her to launch into some speech about how she doesn’t want to date me, but I wasn’t prepared for silence. That’s quite honestly the worst-case scenario. Neither of us tend to do well with extended periods of quiet.
“Well?” I prompt impatiently. “What’re your thoughts?”
Grabbing a clip off the coffee table, she twists her hair and locks it into place. “Okay, well, um… I’m not quite sure what to say, honestly. You caught me off guard, Theo. Give me a second to process, yeah?”
The past few months haven’t been enough time?
My mouth goes dry from the mix of adrenaline and embarrassment and anger, and it’s hard to get any words out. They stick in my mouth, fighting to stay there, but I force them out. “We can go back to being friends or whatever. It’s clear you don’t like me as more than that. Forgive me for thinking you could possibly see me as boyfriend material.”
“Theo, that’s not?—”
I interrupt her before she can finish her sentence, responding with a burst of unwarranted aggression. “I’ve always said my career comes first, but can you not see how important you are to me? How much I like being with you? We hung out while you were on your deathbed with a cold, for Christ’s sake, Josie. I wouldn’t even do that for Blake or Lucas, and they’ve been my best mates forever. What else do I have to do to prove that I’m serious about us?” I snap at Josie’s silence, my usual confidence fading into uncertainty. “You know what? Fine. If all I am is your personal pleasure palace, then so be it. I’m more than happy to live up to my title as a paddock playboy. Why try to fight nature, right?”
Josie presses a hand to her cheek but doesn’t say anything, so I quickly retreat out of her room. I need to catch my breath and figure out where the hell I veered off, made a U-turn, and then crashed into a barrier.
TWENTY-FOUR
JOSIE
The momentthe door to Ella’s hotel suite opens, I barge past her and into the spacious living area. Plush, squeaky dog toys are scattered around the floor and a small crate is tucked away near the tiny en suite kitchen. I tiptoe through an array of colorful toys to find a bare spot on the plush carpet. Sitting down, I pat the floor in front of me. Champ stops chewing on the end of a dinosaur-shaped toy and parades over to me, covering my face in much-needed puppy kisses.
I glance up at Ella. “Is Blake here?”
