Page 67 of Drive Me Crazy
Blake gets back to the hotel room a few hours after me, already showered and changed out of his racing gear. He landed himself in pole position, so there’s no doubt he’s in a great mood.
“Hey, babe,” he greets me with a grin.
“Hi, handsome. I’ll be done working in a minute.”
Which means in about ten to fifteen minutes. He relaxes into the couch and brushes his lips against the top of my head. I nuzzle against him and type away at a rapid speed. Blake reads as I write, watching as the words of his life story appear on the page.
“You used the wrong form of the word,” he says a few minutes later. “It should beare, notour.”
His finger gently taps the spot on my screen to indicate the mistake.Holy shit. Is my mind that preoccupied that I can’t use the correct three-letter word?
“What’sgoing on with you, love?” Blake asks gently. “Your head’s been in the clouds all week.”
My gaze bounces around the room, landing everywhere but on him. He’s like a damn ninja mind reader and I don’t want my jumbled thoughts exposed like that. There’s no denying I’ve been a space cadet lately.
“I’m okay,” I say a moment later. Squeezing his thigh lightly, I give him what I hope is a reassuring look. “Jack said something that’s been on my mind, I guess. But I’m fine. Don’t worry, okay?”
“What was it?” Blake asks, immediately concerned. A dark cloud of a scowl washes over his features. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s really not that big of a deal.”
Blake stares at me with an intensity I’m not used to seeing off the track. “If it’s not a big deal then just tell me.”
Before I can argue that he can’t demand answers like that, his serious expression turns into a wolfish grin. Without another word, he scoops me up and carries me over to the cloud-like bed, then lowers his body onto mine. I try wriggling my way out because my organs are being crushed beneath his weight, but it’s no use. I’m trapped.
“This is the worst hug ever, Blake.”
“I’m quite enjoying it.”
“Because you can breathe,” I cough out. “Do you have an asphyxiation kink or something I should know about? You seem to like suffocating me.”
“No.” He burrows his face into my neck. “I’m only trying to suffocate the secrets out of you.”
After a minute of my squirming, he finally rolls off me, propping himself up on his elbow. He twirls a piece of my hair in between his fingers, watching me with a frown.
“I’m not going to force you to tell me,” he says tenderly. “I just want you to trust me, El.”
I curl up on my side to face him. “You’re the only personwho knows about my secret fear of seahorses, Blake. Of course I trust you.”
He lets out a chuckle from deep in his chest. “Seahorses aren’t the reason you’ve been acting off, love. Talk to me.”
If the situation were reversed, I’d be just as persistent to find out what was eating at him. Sighing through closed lips, I bury my apprehension. “The guy Jack’s dating is recommending me as a host for this new podcast his company’s producing.”
“People at Little Big Town?”
“Big Town, but yes.” He can never seem to remember that Jack’s newest boy works for Big Town, not the American country group.
Blake listens intently as I recap the conversation. When I finish speaking, I slowly release a deep breath, the tightness in my chest fading.
“Are you considering it?” His forehead puckers in thought. “I know he only suggested your name, but are you open to the idea?”
“Maybe. I don’t know,” I mumble. “I made a pro-con list, but I’m not sure any of it matters.”
“Why not? What’s holding you back?” Blake asks, his voice low and calming. “Your podcast was amazing, El. You have to know that.”
My body feels like it’s burning from the inside out. It’s an inescapable feeling of dread that washes over me and doesn’t let go until I push all thoughts of what happened out of my mind. I avoid eye contact like it’s my full-time job, so Blake ducks his head to try to catch my line of vision. His eyes lock with mine, and my heart skips a beat. There’s so much going on in my head that the words fight to get out, leaving me tongue-tied. Blake waits patiently, running his thumb against my hip in a soothing motion. Will talking about this ever get easier?
“Youknow how I told you a girl I know was assaulted?” I finally ask after a few minutes of silence. “At work last year?”
