Page 7 of Taking the Pitch
I whip my head to the side and look at Hudson, who has paused our game and is now staring back at me expectantly. Grabbing my glass off the table, I take a drink of my water, trying to collect my thoughts.
Kessler was right. My actions don’t just affect me anymore. Shame burns through my stomach that I even have to have this conversation. I set my glass back down on the table and clear my throat. “Why do you ask?”
He lifts a shoulder, then drops it. “Mom was talking on the phone with Aunt Kara about it this morning, but when she saw me walk in the kitchen, she changed the subject.”
Ah, so he thought he’d come to cool Uncle Judd for answers. I’m in enough trouble with my brother and his wife-to-be. I don’t need to add to it. “Well, Hud, I think if your mom wanted you to know, she would have told you.”
“Know what?” Kessler asks, coming into the game room with a very thick book I can’t read the title of and sitting in the recliner next to the couch Hudson and I are sitting on.
Hudson turns in his seat slightly to look at Kessler. “I asked Uncle Judd what a DUI was.”
Kessler shoots me a quick “I told you so” look, before turning his attention to Hudson. I can see the internal struggle on hisface about how much he really wants to tell him. Kessler has taken to being Hudson’s dad, like a fish to water and I only hope when I eventually have a family, I’m half the dad Kessler has become. Blowing out a breath, Kessler runs a hand through his hair, tugging at the ends. “It’s something a person gets when they have had too much to drink and decide to drive and a police officer pulls them over.”
“Okay… But why was Mom talking to Aunt Kara about it? She seemed pretty upset about it.”
Kessler raises a single eyebrow directly at me and tips his head, giving me a “This one is on you” look.
It’s my turn to blow out a breath. “Well Hudson, that’s because I got a DUI last night.”
After a few beats of silence, Hudson nods his head slowly, and I can see the wheels turning in his brain, trying to figure out what that means. “Did you have to wear handcuffs?”
I nod and try to shove down the shame that rises in my chest. I’m supposed to be someone Hudson looks up to and I feel like I’ve failed on an epic level.
Kessler clears his throat and sits forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “This doesn’t mean Judd is a bad person, though.” He looks at me for a beat before turning his attention back to Hudson. “Sometimes, good people make bad decisions. It’s what they do after their mistake that matters.”
Hudson nods again and un-pauses his game, now focusing on the screen. “Is there anything else you want to ask me?” I ask him. I want to make sure he has the right answers to any of the questions he may have.
Hudson shakes his head. “Not right now, but if I have more later, can I ask?”
“Anytime Hud,” Kessler says, leaning back in the chair and opening the book he brought in with him.
“Whatcha reading?” I ask, still not able to see the cover. Kessler holds up the book and I squint, trying to make out the words, but all I can make out is a picture of a pregnant woman on the front. “I don’t have my glasses. Is that a pregnancy book?”
Kessler lays the book back down on his lap and scratches the back of his neck. “It is. Lucy got it for me after the–” He pauses and gives me a sheepish look. “Jogging incident. It’s calledWhat to Expect When You’re Expecting.It tells you what is happening in the woman's body each month, and what development is going on with the fetus, or in our casesfetuses.It’s…eye opening and has actually been really helpful.”
I look at my brother as he looks back down at the book and continues to read. Awe and, if I’m honest, envy runs through me. I can’t believe he’s going to be a dad. Well, he’s already a dad to Hudson, but he’s going to havebabies.I never realized until he met Lucy, how badly he wanted a family to call his own, and now here he is only six months later, and he not only has a fiancée and a son already, but he has two more on the way.
Something in my chest pangs, and I rub at it, willing it to go away. I’m not ready for that yet. I still have oats to sow. Not that there’s been much of that going on lately, but still, I have plenty of time to set down roots.
I turn back to the screen and watch Hudson playMario Kartwhen my phone pings with a text. Unlocking it, I see a text from Charlie.
Charlie
How do you feel about kids and dogs?
Charlie must have found a couple of programs for me already. Damn, she’s fast, but she wouldn’t be head of PR if she wasn’t good at her job.
Me
I love being around both.
Charlie
Do you read?
If she only knew how extensive my book collection is. It’s not something I brag about, though; I keep the fact that I read under wraps. I was picked on in middle school and the first year of high school because I always had my nose in a book. The only people who know my love of reading is my family. Now if I’m on the road for away games, I read on the kindle app on my phone, so I can easily hide it. So instead of giving her the answer I want to give her, I play it cool.
Me
