Page 25 of Come As You Are
“Do I need to give you another lecture on interoffice hookups, Bastian?” Maria asked.
“No,” Sebastian said. He took hold of Maria’s arm. “The bathroom is this way.”
I didn’t hear everything they said to each other as Sebastian escorted her down the short hall, but I caught enough to know Maria was telling him not to hurt me, and he was telling her he didn’t plan to. Her incredulity did nothing to help calm mynerves, and I scrambled to get dressed before Sebastian came back.
“Vee.”
My back was to the door as I searched for my shirt. Sebastian’s room wasn’t the neatest, and he seemed to keep his clothing in overflowing laundry baskets rather than putting anything away. I straightened and stood, a handful of shirts in my hands—none of them mine—as Sebastian crossed the threshold, then took them from me. He pulled out a red T-shirt and handed it to me. I pulled it over my head as quickly as I could.
“Vee,” he said again. “You know I don’t have a stellar reputation, but I meant what I said to you. You make me want to try to do better.”
I nodded, intending to tell him that I believed him, but what came out of my mouth was something entirely different. “What about Olivia?” I asked.
Sebastian stilled. He’d been about to reach for me, and his hand paused in midair. “I don’t think we need to say anything yet.”
“That’s not what I meant.” I turned to face him and squared my shoulders. We were almost the same height, and I only had to lift my chin a bit to meet his gaze. “You love her.” It wasn’t a question because I didn’t want him to think there was room to equivocate. “I see you watch her, know you look up at her window hoping to catch a glimpse of her. I see the look on your face whenever she walks into the room.”
Sighing, Sebastian let his hand continue its trajectory until it touched my face. He cupped my chin. “It’s been three years,” he said. “If there was any hope of a future with Olivia, it would have happened by now.”
I nodded. “Just don’t lie to me,” I said. “If all you want is what happened last night, tell me straight up. I’m not fragile. I won’t break. I only want to know where I stand.”
My declaration made Sebastian smile. “I promise, but I expect the same from you.” He leaned forward and kissed the tip of my nose, then lifted my chin a bit more so he could kiss me.
“All right, lover boy,” Maria said from the doorway. “Let’s see if we can make you look like a credible drag queen.”
I felt Sebastian shift and was pretty sure he was giving Maria the finger behind his back, but he never took his eyes off me. “We okay?” he whispered, and I nodded. He gave me another quick kiss, then turned to face Maria. “Do your worst,” he said.
Two hours later, Sebastian’sliving room looked as if the dressing room at Illyria had exploded all over it. There were gowns and heels, makeup and wigs, and weird pieces of undergarments—of whose purpose I had no clue and wasn’t sure I wanted one—tossed over every available surface.
Maria had brought one of the other drag queens with her, and she and Lexi had whipped Sebastian in and out of outfits so quickly, my head was spinning. Ultimately, though, they found something that worked for him: a slim, red sequenced sheath dress that hugged his flat abs and muscular thighs. It set off his dark hair and coloring beautifully, but that was just the beginning because Lexi sat Sebastian down on the couch and started doing his makeup.
Although I’d seen the queens at Illyria in various stages of dress, I’d never seen the entire process from start to finish, and it stunned me how much went into creating a look. I was thankful all I had to do was oil myself up and slide on a pair of cutoffdenim shorts and my boots. Sometimes, I added some glitter, but most of the time I didn’t bother. It didn’t seem to make any difference one way or the other to the guys who stuffed money in my shorts.
“If we had time, we’d wax your chest,” Lexi said as she added contour lines to Sebastian’s cheeks.
“Thank fuck you don’t,” Sebastian growled.
I silently agreed because his chest was just the right amount of furry, and I hadn’t had nearly enough time to run my fingers through it.
Maria and Lexi moved on from makeup to wigs. Some were outrageous towers that would have looked at home in the court of Louis XVI, and some looked like the ones they sold at my mom’s salon in Twin Falls. They finally settled on a relatively tame one that matched Sebastian’s natural hair color and made him look quite glamorous. I was kind of taken with Bast’s queen persona.
By that time, I had to head out for my shift at Illyria. I contemplated calling in sick, but Sebastian nixed that idea.
“With both Maria and me off tonight, someone’s got to keep an eye on things,” he told me as I stuffed my “work clothes” into my backpack. “Just be careful.” He crowded into my tiny bedroom, teetering on the heels Lexi had given him.
I put my hands on his arms to steady him. “I’m not going to do anything stupid,” I said.
“No, but the customers can get handsy sometimes.”
“That never bothered you before.” I smirked at him.
“That’s because you weren’t mine to worry over before.”
The possessive growl in his voice sent a shiver through me, but I resisted asking the obvious question of whether I was really his. No matter how much I wanted to believe that was true, it was something that only time would prove. My history whisperedthat all love was temporary and conditional, but I pushed it aside.
I kissed Sebastian, trying my best not to smear his lip gloss. The sensation was interesting, at once slick and sticky, but the taste was an awful mix of Vaseline and artificial cherry. Sebastian laughed at the face I made as I searched for a tissue and wiped the disgusting mess off my lips.
The sound of his laughter and his suddenly protective warning for me to stay safe wrapped around me as I left the apartment and headed to the club. It felt nice to have someone who cared about me again. Even if it was only a passing thing, there was still a person who knew where I was and would be waiting for me when I returned. I hadn’t been aware it was something I missed until I had it again, but it made me smile all the way to work and kept me smiling as I got up on my dance platform for my first shift.
