Page 61 of The Best Man Problem
He stood, unable to sit next to her as she continued her story, his mind refusing to separate what happened to him and what Lilly was telling him. It all swirled together in a confusing, jumbled mess.
“He told me he wanted to keep our relationship a secret because he didn’t want to take away from his friend’s special day. Turns out his wife, the bride’s cousin, was serving overseas and got some kind of special pass to come surprise everyone for the week of the wedding. I had no idea he was married. If I had, I never would have looked twice at the scumbag.”
So she hadn’t known he was married. Of course she hadn’t. That information should make him feel better, but somehow, it didn’t. Lilly hadn’t intentionally harmed another’s marriage, so why couldn’t he look at her? Why did the sickness in his gut start spreading out into his entire body, filling him with nothing but anger and betrayal?
“When our clients found out, they sued us. The bride was furious at what I’d done. I was disgusted with myself for my part, even though I had no idea the asshole was married. We almost lost the business.”
Which would explain her rule.
“I’m not a cheater, Lincoln.” The soft but fierce declaration was whispered at his continued silence.
He knew how hard it must have been for her to share such a personal and painful bit of her past. Logically, he even knew she hadn’t been at fault for what happened. But he just couldn’t get over the fact that Lilly had slept with a married man. He felt the betrayal from his wife’s infidelity all over again. This had nothing to do with him, he knew that, but his rational brain wasn’t in charge at the moment.
Right now, all he could do was feel. And all he was feeling was pain.
He was just letting his past color the situation. As much as he’d wish it otherwise, her revelation had shocked him back to that angry, bitter husband who’d discovered the woman he once loved, the woman he’d promised to be faithful and true to, had not honored her vow to do the same. It wasn’t fair to either of them, but here they were.
“Lincoln?”
He turned at the hesitant call of his name to see Lilly sitting in the bed, blanket pulled up to her chin like a shield. He saw the question in her eyes, the need for him to reassure her that everything was okay, that this didn’t change anything.
But it did. He couldn’t help his past, and neither could she.
“I’m sorry, I’m just… I’m going to take a shower.” He turned to head into the bathroom, unable to face the pain and disappointment in her eyes. “You should probably pack your things. We wanna get out of here before the cleaners come, right?”
He strode toward the bathroom with a single-minded purpose, pushing down all the messy, confusing feelings inside and shutting the door behind him. He cranked the water up as hot as it would go, letting the pounding jets redden his skin, wishing they could burn away all this ugly pain inside, all the while his mind filling with the image of the anguish on Lilly’s face as he’d dismissed her.
He’d screwed up. And he didn’t know how to fix it or even if he wanted to.
You jackass, of course you do. Lilly is amazing, and you’re being a dick.
True. But he didn’t know how to get over the spike of agony he’d felt the moment she revealed the man she’d slept with had been married. She didn’t know! He had to remind himself of that. It wasn’t Lilly’s fault. The logical side of him wanted to find the asshole and pummel him. Not only for hurting Lilly and dragging her into the whole sordid thing, but also for hurting his wife by cheating. Both women had been wronged, and the only person to blame was the man who’d lied.
The water started to go cold, and he turned off the tap, now feeling doubly like a dick for taking all the hot water. But when he came out of the bathroom five minutes later, Lilly was fully dressed in a pair of black slacks and a crisp white button-down shirt. Her hair had been twisted into a bun on the top of her head. Glasses covering her eyes but in no way shielding the stony expression in her gaze.
“I’ll only be a minute,” he said, grabbing his bag of clothes and heading back into the bathroom.
Lilly took a giant step backward as he approached. He didn’t miss the significance of the move. The woman didn’t want him within touching distance. He couldn’t say he blamed her. He was being an ass.
“Be quick, please.” She lifted her chin, tossing back her shoulders. “I’m going to make a final check of the house, and I need to lock up after all parties leave the premises.”
All parties, she’d said. Not them. He’d gone back to being a client relation. How the hell could he have screwed this all up so badly? He needed to talk to her, to explain where his knee-jerk reaction had come from. But doing that would open up a wound he wasn’t sure he was ready to reveal to her.
Still, she deserved some kind of explanation.
“Lilly, I—”
“Make sure you don’t leave anything you value behind or it will be thrown out.”
With those parting words, she turned and headed out of the room. Lincoln made his way into the bathroom and quickly dressed. He packed up all his stuff, checking the room once more to make sure they left nothing behind.
The bed was rumpled, sheets askew. He grabbed the comforter from the floor where Lilly left it and tossed it on top of the bed. It hung off the edge at his lackluster throw, then slowly slipped to the floor. The perfect metaphor for how this morning had gone. From sex-strewn sheets to a huge, suffocating blanket slowly sliding, all the pleasant memories crashing to the floor.
He left the room and headed for the front door, where an impatient Lilly waited, foot tapping in her black pumps.
“I hope you have a scraper in your car, because the storm covered it in snow.”
Lilly had driven up with Mo for the wedding, and since the woman left the night of, that meant Lincoln would be driving her home. A fact that had excited him just a few hours ago but now sounded like the worst drive of his life. He knew by the set of her shoulders that she didn’t want to hear any explanation for his behavior this morning. He wasn’t even sure he could give her one right now. Her reveal was too fresh in his mind.
