Page 99 of Ravage
I roll onto my back and cover my eyes with the back of my arm. “You know, when we traded codes to get into each other’s apartments for emergencies, this isn’t what I meant.” It comes out grumpier than I intended, but I’m still spitting and hissing internally at what happened with Aiden last night.
At myself for letting it get as far as it did.
At him for stopping it.
Ugh. I hate him so much.
She sits on the edge of the bed and tsks at me. “Nonsense. You love my visits. I brought you water and medicine for the hangover. I also snagged us some breakfast sandwiches.”
My arm flops back onto the bed, and I look at her like she’s the fucking moon goddess. “You’re right. I fucking love you. Don’t ever leave me.”
She smiles, but there’s a tinge of sadness to it that sets off alarm bells. She hands over the cup of water and pain relief without a word.
I sit up and take them, then jump on that look before she can get away with it. “What was that look? Please tell me that you aren’t actually thinking of leaving here.”
Portia sits on the bed with me, legs crossed while holding her ankles. “I don’t know yet. What was it like traveling on your own the last couple of years?”
“It was hard, Porsh. I never knew where I would be eating or sleeping some nights. You can meet some people who will take advantage of you the first chance they get.”
She chews on her bottom lip. “But weren’t there fun times? Didn’t you feel…free?”
I frown. That’s not…really how I would have put my time hopping around from one place to the next. “What’s this really about? Why do you want to leave?”
“Well, I’ve been here for two years and haven’t gotten a single memory back. I was thinking…maybe if I went off and explored a bit, something might bring them back. Or I might remember something.” She fidgets in her spot. “I’ve been leaning on Elias too much and it feels like I’ve become…trapped. And then when your goons showed up, I’m trapped even more between the club and this apartment.”
My heart sinks in my chest. This is all my fault. If I hadn’t come here, she wouldn’t have to worry about GE. She was only brought to their attention because of me.
“No. That’s not what I meant, Rae!” She leans forward and puts her hands on my legs. “I’m so happy I’ve met you. And it was like this before you showed up. Elias just made things so…easy. And I thought I was happy with that. But now that he’s been gone for a bit, I realize that I’ve been using him as my crutch. An excuse to not go out in the world and discover who I am.”
“Let me go with you, then.” I grab her hands in mine. I don’t want to lose her friendship. And I know how bad the world can be out there. At least if I’m with her, I could help protect her.
Or would I just draw more danger to her?
“Or wait until I deal with GE, and then we can go together,” I amend.
Portia shakes her head. “I think I need to go before Elias comes back. Because…I don’t know if I’ll be able to leave if he’s here,” she adds, her face flushing at the admission.
My face splits into a grin. I try to keep my cool, but inside, I’m cackling. “You like him, then?” I’d suspected when she was upset he’d left, but I didn’t want to put my hopes there. It could have been wishful thinking after learning about Elias’s secret crush and how sweet they would be together. At least the two of them can give me hope for nice relationships.
She smiles, embarrassed, but her voice is strong when she answers. “Yup. A lot. Too much.”
Cue internal screaming.
I clear my throat. “I see. Well, have you talked to him about it?”
“About liking him?”
I grin at her. “No, I meant about wanting to go see the world. I guess that, too, but I’m sure if you asked him, he would help you with that. Maybe even go with you. Just…don’t go rushing off too soon, yeah?”
Portia smiles and tucks her hair behind her ear. “All right. I’ll think on it some more.” She pauses. “So? Where’s the man I saw bring you upstairs last night? And why is half of your headboard gone?”
I chug the cup of water until it’s empty and set it on the nightstand. “That was Aiden ruining my night.”
Portia crosses her arms over her chest. “That was rude.” She inhales sharply. “Wait, so then did you two—” She points at the headboard.
“No! We didn’t. I mean…we almost, but then we remembered we hate each other, so he handcuffed me to the bed and left me. I turned it to dust of course, but I was so angry that I overshot it a bit.”
She snickers and falls back on the bed, spreading her arms out wide. “Handcuffing you sounds like foreplay to me. Or, so I’ve heard at least.”
