Page 61 of Beating Heart
“I heard you stayed home sick yesterday?” Demi asked. “No one misses a beat in Magnolia Falls. Oscar Daily let me know you hadn’t gone to work first thing in the morning when he stopped in for his coffee.” We all shared a laugh because the man didn’t have young kids, but he somehow seemed to know everything going on with everyone in town.
I sighed and filled them in on the entire fiasco that was my day yesterday.
“So, today would have been your wedding day?” Saylor had so much empathy in her gaze when she asked the question, it made my chest squeeze.
“Yeah. But I’m happy that I’m sitting here with all of you instead of walking down the aisle. And, in a weird way, after jumping into the water in my wedding gown yesterday, I feel like I’ve got closure with everything.” I chuckled.
“It’s okay if you’re feeling sad today. You can talk to us,” Demi said, as Winnie and Dandelion came over and settled on the patio together, lying down and sprawling out in front of us.
“I’m actually feeling really good. It’s not the wedding or even Collin that I struggle with at this point. In the end, it’s Farah that I’m most hurt by, which doesn’t make a lot of sense. I was planning to spend my whole life with Collin, yet I feel sort of relieved that it all blew up. But getting her call yesterday… that hit me hard.”
“Do you want my opinion?” Ruby asked, and everyone leaned forward, resting their elbows on their knees like they couldn’t wait to hear what she was going to say.
“Sure. I’d love to wrap my head around this.”
“Well, from what you’ve shared, it’s the betrayal that hurt more than the fact that you lost the love of your life, which tells me that he wasn’t really that person for you. But either way, having a man that you thought you would spend the rest of your life with betray you with your lifelong best friend—yeah, that’ll leave a mark. Of course, it hurts.” She took a sip of water, and her gaze locked with mine, as if she were asking if I wanted more.
I nodded. “That makes sense.”
“Do you want my theory on this?” she asked.
“Oh, I love it when Ruby gives us her theories. She’s always spot on,” Peyton said, and they all nodded in agreement.
“Sure. Lay it on me.”
“I think you dated Collin for most of your adult life. He was your only boyfriend, so you had nothing to compare him to. You made plans when you guys were young, and you held up your end of the bargain. Sort of like the mentality, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” She shrugged, and I nodded, following her easily. It all made sense. “You were busy becoming a doctor and working hard, and you settled because he didn’t give you a reason not to.”
“Until he became a complete dickhead and banged your bestie.” Peyton raised a brow. “Hello! Wake-up call. They actually did you a favor, even though it probably didn’t feel that way at first.”
I laughed because there was some truth to her words, but the way they went about it definitely didn’t feel like a favor. “I’m sure they could have handled it better, but I get what you’re saying.”
“You dodged a bullet,” Saylor said.
“Agreed.” Demi squeezed my hand. “And we scored by getting the best doctor in town.”
“Have you started applying to other hospitals yet? I know you said you aren’t planning on staying, but I’m still hoping this town grows on you.” Saylor pushed to her feet and smiled.
“I did hear back from a few hospitals, and I have some interviews set up over the next couple of weeks. But Boston Children’s is my top choice. It’s where I wanted to do my residency, but Collin didn’t want to leave San Francisco because his job was there, and our families were not far, being in Rosewood River.” I shook my head because that decision had all been based around this future that I was so hellbent on having at the time. But, at the end of the day, I allowed that to steer me, and that was on me. I wouldn’t make that mistake again. Moving forward, all decisions will be my own. “Anyway, they called, and I have an interview with them in a few weeks.”
They all squealed and clapped and shared their enthusiasm with me before Saylor went inside to bring the veggie and fruit platters outside for us to munch on.
Something caught my attention in my peripheral, and I don’t know how I knew, but the way Nash shouted my name—I just knew. I was already moving and reaching for the inhaler in his backpack as I sprinted toward the dock.
He pulled up on the jet ski and lifted Cutler off just as I arrived. He was gasping and struggling for air, and I dropped to the ground as Nash set him on my lap and I shook the inhaler.
“This is going to help. We’re going to take four puffs, okay?” I kept my voice calm as his back melded against my chest. I held the device to his lips, and we counted out as he breathed in the medication.
Nash hovered above us, knees bent and eyes panicked.
Water dripped from his body, splashing against my arm, but I kept my focus on Cutler.
With each puff, I felt his breathing slow slightly, but it meant that it was working. Cutler’s little hand wrapped around my forearm as if he wanted to hold me there.
“I’m not going anywhere, I promise. You’re okay. That’s what the medication is for.” My heart raced, but my voice continued to stay calm.
It was important.
Nash’s gray gaze found mine.
