Page 62 of Kiss Kiss Bang
“Come on, Con. How can I not worry?”
He had a smirk on his face as he moved toward her, causing her to take a step back. Then another. And then his lips touched hers in an intense kiss that left her surprised. It was hard and possessive, and his tongue slid into her mouth and his fingers pressed into the skin by her hip. She could taste the cigarettes on him. Pressing her back against a wall, he continued to kiss her, making her feel heady and irresponsible. “I like that you worry. No one else worries,” he said between kisses, his hand moving up her side firmly until he was practically cupping one of her breasts.
“Let’s go home, Con,” she said breathlessly. He knew—he had to have known—that she wanted more, that she was willing to give him more.
Instead he moved back down and kissed her again. Catcalls and whistles from around her snapped her out of her lustful haze. “Stop.” But he didn’t. “Stop, Con.” When he still didn’t, he pushed him hard. “I said, stop.”
He was panting and so was she. He looked at her with a combination of lust and anger. “You’re such a fucking tease sometimes.” For a moment she thought he was joking around but that quickly changed when she realized he was genuinely upset.
“A tease?”
He huffed and turned to the inside of the house, Olivia trailing behind him, just as angry. “Stop. What do you mean a tease?”
He turned, anger written all over his face. “Yeah, one moment we’re making out and the next you’re pushing me away. What the hell?”
“I’m not pushing you away.”
He rolled his eyes and walked away again.
“Yo, brother, my man!” Diego, a tall, jacked-up guy whom she’d seen a dozen times bumped Connor. He’d grown up in their hood and was very known, mostly because he was the guy you went to for drugs. On more than one occasion she’d seen her parents talking to him or his brother on a street corner. He was at least ten years older than Olivia and Connor and most of the other kids at the party.
Then, as if the night couldn’t possibly get any worse, she was surprised to see Connor’s brother walk up to them. “Colin. You’re out.”
“Yep. Got out this morning,” Colin said, giving Connor a one-armed man-hug. “See you’re still tapping that ass,” Colin said to Connor, then turned and winked creepily at her.
“Shut the fuck up,” Connor responded. Olivia gave Colin the finger, but Connor quickly pushed her arm down and eyed her warily.
This wasn’t where she needed to be. In fact, this was exactly the place she needed to avoid. Getting sucked into this life was easier than fighting it. Persevering, that was what was truly difficult.
Colin and Diego laughed and went off into the house.
One of the guys nearby took out a joint from behind his ear and lit it, then handed it to a few other people standing around the area. When they handed it to Connor she hoped that he’d refuse it, but instead he took a long puff and exhaled.
“I wanna go home, Con.”
He exhaled, coughed, and then looked at her. “Why? No.” He handed her the joint. “Take a hit. Relax.”
“Who’s this?” A guy she’d never met tipped his chin her way. He had tattoos going up his neck, a shaved head, and crazy, wild eyes. He was big and scary and she almost shivered when he looked at her, but having grown up in the area she knew better than to show any sign of weakness. She needed to hold her own, not seem like a challenge but also lay low. Once these gangbangers wanted something they were relentless, and she didn’t want to catch their attention, so the way he kept looking at her sent chills down her spine. “Let’s go upstairs,” he said, not asking. Telling her.
A heavy arm quickly landed on her shoulders and pulled her close. “Nah, Helm. She’s with me.” Connor said. Oh, Helm . . . he must be the guy who owned the place. It was notorious for parties, but she’d never met him.
Helm looked at her for another moment, eyes scanning her body in a creepy way that made her want to throw up. “Babe,” Connor said, jolting her out of her thoughts. He’d never, not in all the years they’d known each other, called her babe. “Here you go.” He brought the joint up to her lips and she inhaled, trying to seem comfortable and familiar in Connor’s arms and in the environment. That seemed to somehow assuage the guy’s curiosity, given that Connor had basically staked his claim on her.
With Connor’s arm flung casually over her shoulder, he and Helm talked shit about something Olivia had no knowledge of. At some point she ended up with a beer in her hand and another puff of weed.
“Come on,” Connor said after a while, pulling her into the apartment. She was feeling fuzzy and lightheaded and a lot less uptight then when she’d walked in. Plus, Connor was being sweet and attentive and it felt nice. Maybe when they left the party she could have a real and long-overdue conversation with him—finally admit she was in love with him. She’d been saving from her job at a bookstore and she had enough for two bus fares out to Florida, and she couldn’t wait to leave and start their new lives far away from here.
“Whatever you’re thinking about, stop. Kiss me again,” he said, and kissed her before she’d had a chance to react. This time he tasted of weed and beer and was being a little rougher. “We’ll go inside for a minute, then back to my house.”
He brought the bottle of beer back to his mouth, took a long pull, and then tossed it across the room toward the garbage can, but he missed and didn’t bother getting up and throwing it away. The haziness and cloudiness in her brain intensified. She was feeling way too relaxed.
“Let’s just go now,” she said. “Why wait?” She wobbled a little side to side as she said it. How many beers had she had? The one in her hand was full and pretty cold but she remembered having drunk at least another one before—or maybe two more?
He chuckled. “Whoa,” he said, and held her elbow to keep from falling. He said something but she couldn’t understand most of it. “Why don’t you just stay right here? I’ll be right back and then we’ll take off.” He leaned her into the corner by the front door.
The apartment smelled. It was dirty and dark and made her feel much the same as that guy, Helm, had made her feel earlier. Uncomfortable. There were a lot of people drinking, people who looked thin and pale and were barely able to stand. She looked around while yawning and saw Connor reach into his back pocket and take out some money. He handed it to Helm, who nodded to Diego, who handed Connor something back. It wasn’t overtly obvious, mostly it was slid from one palm to another, but she saw it and anyone who was watching could see it too. Connor put whatever it was into his pocket, then they all did that stupid fist bump thing, and then he was beside her again.
“What was that?”
