Page 49 of Under His Command
Lust.
Pure, undiluted obsession.
And a dash of madness, because only a crazy person would find what he did romantic.
“I thought… I thought you were a good man.”
His eyes darken, hands dipping back under my nightgown.
“Who told you that?”
SEVENTEEN
They say love makes you do crazy things—things that go against everything you believe in and everything you think you are. Things you’d never fathom you’d be able to carry out. For so long, I refused to believe one’s mind could be coerced so easily into committing crimes in the name of love. But falling for Rowan—and being loved so unapologetically—has proved every single one of these claims right.
He watched me. Stalked me. Invaded my privacy in so many moments of my life. If I had any brains in my skull, I’d run far away from this man and go back to what life was before him.
Except… there is no before Rowan. There’s only the aftermath of him loving me, of me being completely engrossed by his fierce claim over my heart. I couldn’t go back to that “before” even if I wanted to. Because the moment he asked me to be his, it’s like something shifted in the universe and every other possible door of my destiny slammed shut.
I’ve called Rowan my monster before, not because I’m afraid of him, but because I understood from the very beginning the kinds of things he was willing to do—the lengths he’d go to—to get what he wants.
Firing my bodyguard was tame, Cam told me. But stalking someone for years and falling madly in love with her through a bunch of screens? That’s pretty crazy. That’s pretty fucking insane. And so is turning a blind eye to the fact. So at this point, I don’t even know who’s crazier between the two of us.
I’m watching the news on the TV upstairs, following Rowan with my eyes on the screen. It’s old footage of him visiting the White House and shaking hands with various politicians, despite the news being fresh.
The Coalition occupied two-thirds of the Ridge after recently being pushed back. Political scientists are speculating Austria has a play in this, in helping them. And the question on everyone’s lips is, “What will Commander Rowan King do about that”?
“It’s not Austria,” he says from behind me, startling me.
I turn around, seeing him lean against the doorframe with his arms crossed at his chest, muscles bulging against his black T-shirt.
“The EFW…?” I ponder, lifting myself to a sitting position on the couch.
Rowan nods, and a knot forms in my gut.
“What are you going to do? You can’t tell the country about their existence, can you?”
“No. It’d be like telling them aliens are real,” he snorts. “I’m going to have to lie. I’m going to have to make allies with people who don’t deserve it. Because the alternative…” He walks into the room, dragging a hand through his hair. “The alternative is they win, and the whole fucking world loses instead.”
I don’t even dare ask him what the hell that means. It’s as if he’s telling me over and over again that the boogeyman is real. And every time he does, I bring my knees closer to my chest, hiding in my shell.
I turn back to the TV, changing the program to some random movie I don’t intend to watch.
“Angel…” he groans, approaching me. His hand caresses the top of my head and I close my eyes, focusing on the feeling of him. He slides it down to my chin, lifting it up so I can look at him. “Talk to me. What’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours?”
“Don’t ask me that,” I say, jerking away from his touch. His nostrils flare, and a sense of pride flashes through me at the fact. “I’m not ready to talk to you about last night.”
“Dove—”
Before he can say whatever he wants to say, his eyes slide over to my ringing phone on the glass mini table, the vibrations making it spin slowly in place. I extend my hand forward to pick it up, an unknown number flashing on the screen.
“Can I get some privacy, or is that out of the question now that I’m living in your home?”
“Our home,” he drawls. “Who’s calling?”
I puff out a sigh of frustration, dragging a hand through my hair as I tap to answer the call.
“Hello? Who is this?”
