Page 34 of Castle of the Cursed
A weird laugh escapes my throat.
Since I was a little kid, I’ve felt like I’m missing a kind of anchoring to the world that others are born with. It wasn’t just my parents’ lifestyle—my sense of homelessness went deeper than that. I’ve always felt like a stranger in my age group, in my life, in my own skin.
When I was ten, I read a story about a girl with a hole in her heart that would not heal. Since air kept escaping through it, her feet never touched the ground, and she floated over her life, unable to actually live it.
That’s how I’ve always felt, only now I know why.
This must be the reason Mom and Dad kept me on the run; so no one would get close enough to see the truth.
I’m just like Sebastián—a very lifelike ghost.
“You can’t kill me,” I taunt him with a weird giggle. “I’m already dead! We’re both haunting la Sombra!”
“What is happening?” he asks.
“I’m dead!”
“You are not dead. Trust me.”
“Trust you?” My voice hits a hysterical pitch, but I don’t care. “Neither of us is real!”
“Have you consumed a mind-altering substance? You seem different—where are you going?”
I take the photographs and certificate with me as I race back up the steps to ground level. Sebastián shuts the trapdoor and restores the rug in the span of an eyeblink, but I keep running through the castle until I get to my bedroom, where he’s already waiting for me.
I didn’t get the chance to throw up Beatríz’s pill last night or tonight—the exact two instances when I saw the flickering lights. Sebastián is obviously distracting me because I should have made this connection sooner.
I dig into the pocket of my duffel and pull out the pills I didn’t take my first two nights. This drug must have led me to the purple room. Maybe there’s more it can show me. I toss the seeds into my mouth—
But they don’t land on my tongue.
“What are these?” asks Sebastián. He swiped them in midair.
“Medication from my aunt. Give it back!”
“After what you said about the black fire, are you sure you can trust her?”
“How are you not getting this yet? Nothing matters because we don’t exist and none of this is real—you’re a figment of my imagination, and I’m DEAD!”
I shriek the final word at the top of my lungs, and Sebastián’s icy hand slams on my mouth, pressing against my teeth. The force of his movement shoves me back, and my spine hits the wall, the impact rattling my insides.
I sneak a glance at the door, expecting my aunt to barge in. Sebastián keeps me pinned between the wall and him, and I breathe in through my nose, inhaling the stars that cling to his skin.
“You do not feel dead to me,” he murmurs, sliding his fingers off my lips.
But I still feel the brand of his touch on my mouth. The trusty compass in my gut has gone haywire because it’s pushing me toward the shadow beast.
Sebastián is still staring at my mouth, and I briefly wonder if it’s actually burning. But then he takes a step back, and my lips turn to cinders.
“Give me back my pills!” I snap at him.
“Calm down—”
“GIVE THEM TO ME!” I shout, daring my aunt to hear me.
“You leave me no choice,” he says, and before I can register the threat, he yanks up my chin, bringing my face close to his.
For one ridiculous moment, I think he’s going to kiss me.
