Page 91 of My Heart Still Beats

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For some reason, it’s important to me to show him that I can do this. Still, I’m not quite sure why he wants me to. But I trust him. I trust him enough to know that he thinks this will be good for me.

I gasp in another breath.

Then I hold it, force myself to hold it and breathe out slowly.

He said it was all in the breathing. I close my eyes, concentrate on my breathing.

My fingers feel…strange. The chill increases when I wiggle them, so I hold them still.

I’m not aware of anything else in my body, other than the fact that I’m freezing. So I breathe.

In, out, in, out.

Keeping my eyes closed, my breath steady.

Surely a minute has passed.

But Spencer said he would let me know when a minute had—

“That’s one minute, ma’am. You’re doing great.”

One minute down, two to go.

And then no more thoughts.

I breathe, I breathe, I breathe…

I resist the urge to wiggle my fingers and toes, knowing now that it will increase the chill.

And I breathe, I breathe, I breathe…

In, out, in, out, eyes closed, nothing before me.

Nothing in my mind except breathing…

Breathing…

Breathing…

All thoughts, both good and bad, wiped clean away until my brain is a stark chasm of nothingness.

“And that’s three minutes,” Spencer says.

My eyes pop open, and my body pops up out of the water.

Spencer places a warm towel around my shoulders, and I hold it to me.

Warmth.

It’s grand. But it will take more than a warm towel to ease the chill.

Still…

I feel…

Invigorated, almost, but not the way the Falls invigorated me.

No, this is different. This was almost…

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