Page 84 of My Heart Still Beats
I sit up. “I’m doing okay, Bets. But I need you to do something for me.”
“Of course anything.”
“Stop asking me how I’m doing. I need to stop ruminating.”
Betsy smiles. “It’s wonderful to hear you say that.”
“Yeah. I feel like I’ve spent my life being self-absorbed. First when I left my parents’ house. I was solely focused on me, all the things that had been denied me in their religious home. I was always focused on whatIwanted to do. And now, after Garrett, I find I’m still focused on me. Only for a completely different reason.”
“You have a pretty good reason this time, Tessa.”
“But that’s just it. It’snota good reason. I’m alive.” I stretch out on the lounger and feel the sun’s rays on my skin. “I’m on a beautiful Jamaican beach. My best friend in the world is marrying the man of her dreams. So I’ve been through something. I’m getting help, and today, for the first time in a while, I actually felt like getting out of bed, Betsy.”
“That’s wonderful,” she says. “We should tell Skye.”
“Absolutely not. If Skye shows up, I will tell her. But I refuse to make this weekend about me.”
“It’s funny that you say you’re so self-absorbed, Tessa,” Betsy says. “I’ve never thought about you that way.”
“You haven’t known me that long.”
“It’s not self-absorbed to want to live in the moment.”
“Maybe not, but I wasn’t content to just let Skye be happy with Braden. I made it all about me. About how I was feeling about the whole thing. And it led me to a place I never want to go again.”
The server returns with my fruit plate and coffee.
“Good morning, miss,” he says to Betsy. “What can I get for you this morning?”
Betsy eyes my plate of fruit. “I think exactly what you got her. But put a little cream in my coffee, please.”
“Absolutely.” His dark eyes twinkle at Betsy.
Betsy blushes as he walks away.
“So you think he’s hot?” I say.
“Don’t you?”
“I haven’t seen a man on this resort who isn’t hot yet.”
Except for that bartender last night. He gave me the creeps.
The server returns with Betsy’s food and keeps eyeing her. “I have a break in a few minutes,” he says. “Would you like to take a stroll on the beach?”
Betsy bites her lower lip and looks at me.
I wave my hand. “Please, Betsy, go if you want to. I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Absolutely.”
“If you’re sure you don’t mind.” She hops out of her lounge chair and smiles at the server. “How long is your break?”
“Only fifteen minutes. But it’s a chance for us to talk a little.” He holds out his hand. “My name is Manfred.”
“Betsy,” Betsy says with a smile. “Be back in a bit, Tess.”
