Page 35 of Nine Month Contract
But today is just not my day. My chestnut hair is piled on top of my head, and I have dark circles under my eyes from my sleepless nights after stressing over these negative tests. The pressure is real. How many cycles of this turkey-basting process will Wyatt allow? I know our contract allows for more chances, but at what point will he consider me more of a burden than a working cow?Especially if I’m not actually a working cow.
I turn to the side and stick out my belly, trying to picture a big round bump. It feels impossible, so I shove the hand towel under there to get a better visual, and the reflection staring back at me is just…bizarre.
Becoming a mother has never been something I wanted. As a kid, while other girls in my class would talk about getting married and starting a family, I could never relate. I knew by age eleven I never wanted to become a mom. The nagging fear of turning out like my own parents worried me to the point I didn’t even like boys for a long time.
That changed as I got older, obviously, but the moment a guy would get serious, I’d find a reason to pull away. It was easier than having the “I don’t want children” talk.
Besides, I’m better off on my own. I can accomplish a lot if I put my mind to it, and no one will disappoint me if it’s just me.
I stare at myself, wondering how it will feel with an alien growing inside me. Even the thought is foreign for me, and I imagine the feel of a baby cow moving around. Cringing, I scrap the entire image, thinking about hooves punching me from the inside, and rip the towel out from under my shirt.
Maybe I won’t be good at this after all.
I glance out the window at Wyatt’s cabin, illuminated in the darkness. It looks so beautiful with the twinkling starry sky above it and mountain trees all around. The life Wyatt has built up here for himself with his brothers right next door is like a dream come true. No way will his baby go hungry. All sorts of people around here are checking in and making sure it’s okay.
Is that what Wyatt wished for when he bought this land? Solitude within beauty?Within family?It’s impressive he actually did it.
What I wish for still seems so out of reach, yet being here on this mountain strangely feels like it’s where dreams could come true. I can’t lose hope yet. And if it doesn’t work this month, all this means is I get to spend more nights walking up the hill to see my burly, dangerously hot mountain man.
Well, notminemine. That’s a dream even this magical mountain couldn’t provide. But my insides warm as I think of his steely blue eyes on me every time I came into his house for one of our sessions. He looked at me like he was happy to see me. Like I was a sight for sore eyes.
That’s a feeling I could get used to.
But I need to get myself pregnant to do that.
Maybe it’s time for a backup plan.
AnimalsOntheMountain:2
UnnecessarySoloSessions:5
“When do you guys start, like…trying to get her pregnant or whatever? Or have you already started?” Luke asks from the back seat of the truck as Calder drives us back home after a ten-hour workday.
“None of your business,” I reply, staring out the window and not offering them a shred of detail.
“Oh, come on,” Calder exclaims with a laugh. “I’ve seen her walk up to your cabin from the barn multiple times this past week.”
“You have?” Luke asks, leaning over the bench seat as he swats me on the arm. “Damn, I can’t see anything from my cabin. Does this mean you guys are, like…doing it already? How does it work?”
“I said it’s none of your business,” I growl and turn murderous eyes on Calder. “And stop staring out your window at her. Both of you just leave her the hell alone. I mean it. Don’t go in the barn, don’t talk to her, and don’t look at her. Don’t do anything with her.”
Luke’s brows furrow, obviously hurt by my harsh words. “We would neverdoanything with her. Surely you know that, Wyatt.”
I swallow the lump in my throat at that loaded remark and refuse to let my brain walk down memory lane. “I just don’t want her to feel pressured,” I offer, trying to soften my tone. It’s been fourteen days sincewe started trying, and she should be able to take a pregnancy test any day now. My anxiety is at an all-time high, as I wonder if it worked or not. This crazy plan of mine might become a reality.
Holy shit.
But I shouldn’t get my hopes up. We never even got a chance to try with that official Mosie Baby at-home insemination kit that arrived several days too late. The odds that a Tylenol syringe and plastic dressing cups worked are slim to none. We can try again next month.
My phone pings with an incoming text, and I swipe it open to see a text from my mom. Luke reads over my shoulder and laughs. “She wants to meet Trista?”
“Yes,” I groan and rub my hand aggressively over my hair. “She’s pissed at me because I won’t let her come up to the mountain and give Trista a welcome gift. She’s been bugging me all week.”
“You’re not going to be able to hide her forever,” Calder says, eyeing me seriously.
“You know our family,” I grind out. “This whole thing is stressful enough without comments from the peanut gallery.”
Calder scoffs as he turns off the road and up Fletcher Mountain. My heart rate instantly increases when I see Trista’s car parked outside. She’s usually not home before us, so I can’t help but wonder if she’s home early because she has news.
