Page 272 of Unexpected Ever After

“She is not a vacation conquest,” Wyatt says, breaking me from my musings of a dark-haired fireball.

“I never said she was,” I reply in a cool, even tone.

“If you try, half the town will demand your head on a spike and they’ll be lead by Hank the tank and Fisherman Pete.”

“There’s a lot to unpack there,” I tell him. “For starters, I’m forty-five years old. I’m not exactly in the bag and tag stage of life anymore, nor have I been for a while. Secondly, I won’t deny that she intrigues me in a way that I haven’t been interested in anything or anyone in a long time.”

“All right,” he says cautiously.

“Now—” I start when Zelda unceremoniously slams down two mugs overflowing with beer.

“Are you ready to order?”

“Yes,” I reply instantly.

“Steak and potato,” Wyatt orders. “Start with the gold rush queso.”

“That sounds delightful. I’ll have the same.”

Zelda stomps away again and I can’t help but wonder who Hank and Fisherman Pete are.

“So who’s Fisherman Pete?” I ask.

“You should worry more about Hank the tank if you’re going to chase after Zelda,” he warns.

“Who’s Hank then?” I ask.

“Me,” Full Metal Sam says from beside me. “Who’s asking?”

“I am,” I say with a smile, holding out my hand.

“And you are?” he says, openly sizing me up.

“Court Davies.”

“The adventure show guy?” he asks.

“I am.”

“Like a pretty boy like you could ever survive in the wild.”

“I was SAS for twelve years,” I tell him. I might still be if a training accident didn’t break three vertebrae in my back and retire me early. After I recovered, I trained to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro and then Everest. The rest, as they say, is history.

“Is that so?” Hank asks suddenly, looking at me in a new light. “You just might have what it takes,” he says cryptically.

“And for what would that be?”

“To win my Zelly, of course,” he laughs. “It’ll take a determined man to win her over.”

“I see.”

“Are you up for the job?” Full Metal Sam asks.

I reply the only way I know how. “He who dares, wins.”

“Oh fuck,” Wyatt says as Zelda practically throws our plates on the table and stomps off.

Full Metal Sam just laughs.