Page 75 of The Law of Attraction
“I’m really beat,” he said with this awful, apologetic look on his face. “It’s probably best if I sleep in my own room tonight.”
“Sure,” she said, even though it wasn’t what she wanted to say. She wanted to tell him it wasn’t best for her. That more than anything she wanted him to stay, even if it was only for one more night.
She didn’t tell him those things though, because he’d made up his mind already and she didn’t want to seem pathetic. If she told him how she felt, he’d only feel sorry for her. Even worse—he might stay one more night as a favor. He might feel like he had to, as some sort of consolation prize. The last thing she wanted from him was a pity fuck.
“We’ve got another long day ahead of us tomorrow,” he added, in case she wasn’t convinced. “We’ll both be better off with a full night’s sleep.”
“Yep.” She was being so agreeable. No one had ever agreed with anything more, even if it was breaking her heart a little to do it.
She watched as he moved around the room, packing up the rest of his things, and all she could feel was numb. It wasn’t the least bit cold in the room, but her feet and her fingers were blocks of ice, sending frozen tendrils to her spine and up into her hypothalamus.
She’d known, on some level, that it would probably come to this. The fantasy had been nice while it lasted, but it wasn’t like they could stay here forever in their bubble. She hadn’t ever really believed they could go on like this, what with their jobs and reality waiting for them on the other side of the door.
But she’d hoped. She’d let herself hope, and look what that had gotten her.
Adam finished packing and zipped up his suitcase. He was all ready to go, and because she was helpful—so helpful and so agreeable—Olivia went to hold the door open for him.
He rolled his suitcase over and stopped in front of her. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, but he was so big and tall and standing so close, he took up her whole field of vision. So instead she looked down at the floor with a mumbled goodnight.
But he didn’t leave. He stayed right where he was.
Then his hand—oh god, his hand was touching her face. He cupped her cheek, and his fingers slid into her hair to tip her face up to his, and he gazed down at her with eyes so black and bottomless they could swallow her whole.
He looked like he wanted to kiss her.
An ember of longing flared to life in her chest. The part of her that still clung to hope couldn’t help thinking he’d changed his mind. It sure seemed like he’d changed his mind. He even tilted his head and started to lean in.
But then he just…didn’t.
His hand dropped to his side and he took a step back. “I’ll see you in the morning.” Another step back, and he was on the other side of the threshold now. “Make sure you bolt the door behind me.”
All she could do was nod as he rolled his suitcase away.
The next morning came like a boot to the head. Olivia had hardly gotten any sleep—or at least it felt that way. It was one of those nights where you toss and turn and toss and turn, and it feels like you never really fall asleep, but you must, because when your alarm goes off in the morning you’re so deeply asleep it hits you like a freight train.
She took too long in the shower, standing under the hot spray waiting fruitlessly to feel human again. So when seven o’clock rolled around—the time she’d agreed to meet Adam for breakfast in the lobby—she still hadn’t put on her makeup.
Fuck it, she thought as she hastily twisted her hair into a bun. I’ll wear my real face today.
Who was going to see her or care? Only Adam, who definitely didn’t care, and maybe a couple guys at the plant she’d never see again. She could face the world without makeup for this one day of her life.
Adam was already there when she pushed through the door to the lobby. He turned away from the cereal bar at the sound of the door, and their eyes met across the room.
Jesus shit fuck Christ, those eyes of his.
Did he know what they did to her? How they took her breath away every single time he looked at her?
“I got you a coffee,” he said, pointing to a table where two styrofoam cups sat side by side, steaming.
She made a beeline for them, and gulped down half of one, not even caring that it scalded her throat.
Adam watched her, eyebrows lifted in an expression of amusement. “If it’d be easier, we can fix you up with a caffeine IV.”
He was weirdly chipper this morning. Apparently not sleeping with her put him in an excellent mood. Swell.
“Did you know that bananas are berries but strawberries aren’t?” he announced as she examined the fruit bowl at the breakfast bar.
“Are you kidding?” she mumbled, blinking at the banana in her hand. Somehow this information felt like a personal betrayal, as if bananas had been lying to her as part of some vast fruit conspiracy her whole life.
